Secrets from the Future
by CrazyAni
Summary: Anakin's and Padme's love is pure and strong, but can it survive betrayal? And some secrets from Anakin's past? Palpatine tries to find out...PreRotS short story.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the SW universe. All the characters belong to George Lucas. This story was written for fun and meditation purposes only.

Just a plot bunny that striked me during another Writer's Block for my other fic, "Change of Fate". English is not my native language, and I don't have a beta yet, so I apologise for many, many, many grammar misyakes! ;)

Enjoy anyway!

**Chapter One**

The shroud of twilight fell upon Coruscant. Neon lights embraced the city in a cold glow as numerous speeders lit their way with bright white lights that were too harsh to look at. That was Coruscant, the capital of the Republic at night – though untouched by the horrors of the war that raged across the galaxy for over two years, there was no trace of warmness and love on the planet either – only artificial lights at night and busy turmoil during the day.

Among the crowd of people who cared about nothing but their own well-being, there were few who didn't sleep at night, anxiously awaiting their loved ones return. Mothers missed sons, children needed their fathers, and wives ached for their husbands.

A beautiful young woman, who stood on the balcony of one of the high towers in the elite apartment block Republica 500 brushing her hair, was one of them. To most she was known as Padmé Amidala, former Queen and current Senator of Naboo. In truth, it was only a small part of who she really was. Senator Amidala was merely a shell for the dreamy girl dwelling inside. Her real name was Padmé Skywalker, and that's who she was – the wife and life companion of Anakin Skywalker, the bravest and most loyal man in the galaxy. The man she loved with her entire being so much that it sometimes hurt.

The air outside slowly cooled and Padmé stepped inside, rubbing her hands in a vain attempt to warm them. She felt cold inside, as she always did without him. A dark, lifeless room lay before her eyes. The prospect of spending another night alone brought an ache to her heart. A brush of wind gently blew inside, swooping the curtains in a graceful arch and taking away a lonely sheet of flimsiplast she was working on.

Padmé looked at the table, which was overloaded with endless data pads and sheets of flimsiplast. During the times when he was gone, she always worked harder. Whenever asked why she was so passionate about politics, she usually responded that the galaxy needed her in these dark times, that she liked doing something for the greater good. Her extraordinary political talents made the others believe in what she said in the blink of an eye, but she knew these feeble arguments not to be true, at least not entirely true. The complete truth was that she needed a distraction from the dull ache, from the haunting void in her soul she experienced without him.

Absent-mindedly, she came to the table and picked up a sheet of flimsiplast. "_To Padmé Amidala concerning the law of the Grand Army of the Republic_.", the title said.

_Army. War. Anakin_…She inhaled loudly, the sound resembling a sob, and tore the sheet furiously apart. Finding diplomatic solutions to grave conflicts was what she had been doing since she was a small child. Padmé had always believed in democracy and she would defend it with her last breath. However, at times like these, she doubted whether the Republic could be pulled from the abyss it was tumbling into. All the laws were just words, typed into datapads - words which had no meaning for the daily increasing casualties in the Outer Rim, to the soldiers that died every day believing they made the galaxy a warmer place. These words had no meaning to her husband…

Earlier in the evening, she had watched another HoloNet report about the status of war. More casualities, more death, more destruction…Many children would never see their parents again and countless families lost their home worlds forever. And there was still no word about Anakin or Obi-Wan. They have already been gone for four months and, according to the announcer, no one knew anything about them. Some even believed them to be dead…

Padmé approached the window and looked at the merely twinkling stars above. She saw her own reflection in the transparisteel – a young woman, with her eyes glancing lustreless at the world, and terrible sadness creeping at the corners of her mouth. She saw her transparent image floating with the stars, just where her heart lay. It was a brutal illusion of her dream coming true. Her reflection was above, with Anakin, but she was still in her apartment on Coruscant. Alone…

Where was Anakin? Was he alright? She would sense it if something happened to him, she was sure. Yet Padmé couldn't shake off a feeling of a dark foreboding, slowly sinking its icy claws into her wounded heart. What if something happened to Anakin? She couldn't live without him. She would simply cease to exist if his light burned out.

-----

The screen in a royal apartment in Republica 500 showed the images of the HoloNews transition. Little dirty children in lumps, crying over the bodies of their parents…Devastated cities, lifeless houses and burning forests…Battle fields, with shattered pieces of battle droids and countless dead bodies of fallen heroes… It was a picture of destruction and despair

The Sith Lord turned off the screen, cackling delightedly. Everything was going according to his plan. The galaxy was consumed by darkness, as fear and greed were dominating the Force, nurturing the dark and diminishing the feeble light. It was closing in on the shatter point and the apocalypse.

The Jedi had been keepers of the peace for centuries, maintaining the ocean of the soft glowing light in the Force. The horrors of war and webs of deceit and deception polluted that sea of tranquillity, spreading with the waves of darkness.

There was a single light in the ocean, a unique pearl, which remained untouched by darkness. It alone glowed with bright, disgustingly beautiful light and shoved away the waves of approaching darkness. Anakin Skywalker was the source of light, and were it to be put out, the galaxy would be drown in darkness, for eternity.

From the first moment he laid his eyes on the boy, Sidious saw that this small child would be a perfect ally. He was powerful, brave, but he had also known fear and anger. For many years, Sidious has been preparing his plan, trying to lure the boy to his side and alienate him from the Jedi. Boring hours of listening to unstoppable whining weren't spent in vain as Anakin became an even greater alien among the Jedi than Sidious could ever have hoped, and now he knew Anakin better than the boy did himself. Nothing that held Skywalker in the Light, except for one – Padmé Amidala, the Chosen One's secret wife and one of Sidious' most powerful opponents in the political arena.

If he could only break the two lovers apart, the last anchor would be gone, and Anakin would be embraced by the consummating power of darkness.

Sidious grinned maliciously. The boy had some dark skeletons in his wardrobe, things from his past his wife was not aware of. All Sidious had to do was give a tiny push, and the chain would be set in motion. He had a perfect candidate in mind, who would start the reaction…

----

Her large bed was cold and bleak without his warm body next to hers. Padmé tossed from one side to another, plagued by nightmares in which she watched Anakin die before her eyes.

A soft hand touched her cheek gently and stroked her hair, murmuring the words of comfort into her ear. She knew this touch, and this voice was music to her ears. Padmé's eyes snapped open, and she saw the dark silhouette of her husband, caressing her lovingly. Brown met blue, and gazing into the depths of his intense eyes, she felt complete again.

"Ani?" she whispered in a hoarse voice, a part of her still refusing to believe he had returned to her.

"Shh, Padmé," he echoed back, never taking his brilliant eyes from her face, as if memorizing every little detail of it.

She sat up and flung herself in his waiting arms. She buried her face on his chest, breathing his scent in, letting his presence wash away all the horrors of the night. Ani was home, with her…

"I watched you die before my eyes," she sobbed quietly, tears of happiness and anguish running down her cheeks.

"But I'm here now, Padme," he said softly, stroking her back gently. The endless months of waiting were finally over, and Anakin was by her side again. Two hearts that were never supposed to be separated were together, beating as one, feeling as one…

"I love you Padmé," he murmured into her hair. He held her so tightly as though he was afraid she would slip away if he lessened his grip. "I would die if you were taken away from me."

Padmé shuddered.

It was her gravest fear to lose Anakin. She couldn't understand how she had existed twenty-four years without him in her life. She didn't know how to laugh, she didn't know the skill of savouring the smallest moments of happiness, like a sun ray shining through thick clouds. Her heart didn't know what to love and what being loved felt like. Who was she before Anakin came back into her life? A small, insignificant person, whose heart was covered by a thick armour of ice. His warmness and glowing light had melted the ice away, and destroyed the cage she had put herself in all those years ago. With Anakin she learned how to be just Padmé, not the Senator from Naboo. Anakin taught her so many things…

"I am always by your side, Ani. Nothing will ever change that," she promised him earnestly. She gazed deep into the eyes, losing herself again in the intensity of blue. "I couldn't live without you. I could never leave you."

To her dismay, Anakin pulled himself away from her. She couldn't interpret the look he gave her.

"Are you sure?" he asked quietly. "We live in perilous times, entangled in webs of deception and deceit. Anything could happen. _Anything_."

"Ani, what's going on?" Padmé asked anxiously, feeling cold chills running down her spine. "You are scaring me."

"I need you, Padmé. I'll die if you are gone. I won't survive if you betray me or turn your back on me."

"I could never betray you or…turn my back on you!" Padmé exclaimed worriedly, now positively alarmed. The intense look he gave her became dark and menacing. A dark feeling of foreboding stirred in her. Something was not right here…

"Ani, did you hear me? I would never do anything like that. _Never_," she said fearful, stroking his arm.

He shoved her arm away, looking disgusted. Padmé felt her eyes burning, a shroud of tears started to cloud her vision. Anakin continued to glare at her, and with every instant, she grew more uncomfortable under his stare. It was astonishing how piercing his eyes were. Then the corners of his mouth twitched, forming a menacing, dark smile.

"Liar," he said shortly.

Padmé felt hot tears running down her cheeks. Her vision was becoming blurry, and she believed that the cerulean of his eyes had turned to the venomous yellow.

"No, Ani," she squeaked helplessly, a desperate feeling of fear and hurt claiming her heart.

Icy, inhuman laughter was the only answer to her words. _What was happening to Anakin? _Then his laughter subsided, replaced by an expression of ultimate fury and uncontrolled rage.

"LIAR!" he yelled at her. "You'll stab me in the back and turn away from me, at the moment when I'll need you most. You'll lure me to my death. You'll break my heart, and it will be shattered into thousands pieces, and will never be whole again!"

His ragged breath turned into a cry of pain. A hole in his chest appeared out of nowhere, and Anakin held his heart in his outstretched palm.

"There is my heart," he hissed through gritted teeth. "I sacrificed it for you, and you betrayed me."

"Ani-" Padmé said in a small voice, trying to reach out to him, but he jerked away from her touch.

He started to laugh quietly, a bitter laughter that made her hair stand up. "I loved you too much and was too blind to see who you were."

Another cry of pain burst out of him, and streams of dark mist enveloped Anakin, devouring him from the inside. She tried to call him, say that she loved him, but her voice seemed to have left her. She could only watch Anakin being consumed by impenetrable darkness… The edge of her consciousness vaguely perceived a piercing shriek, and she realised that it came from her own throat, screaming at the top of her lungs.

A warm hand shook her by the shoulder. Padmé flung her eyes open, and stared at the worried face of Dormé.

"Are you alright, milady?" she asked anxiously. "You were screaming in your sleep."

"I'm fine, Dormé. Thank you," Padmé replied weakly, trying to persuade more herself than her handmaiden.

"Are you sure, milady?" Dormé asked uncertainly. "I could stay with you if you'd like me to."

Padmé shook her head firmly no. "I'm alright, Dormé. Really," she added, seeing the doubtful expression on her loyal handmaiden's face. "Go to sleep. And that is an order."

"As you wish, milady," Dormé said, putting out the night lamp.

"Good night, Dormé," Padmé said, adjusting her pillow. She vaguely heard the handmaiden wishing her sweet dreams and her retreating footsteps.

A dead silence fell over the room again. Padmé glanced at the edge of the bed where Anakin had been sitting in her dream. It was perfectly smooth.

_It was just a stupid nightmare_, Padmé told herself, trying to fall asleep again. But she was still shaken from the dream, and the dark sense of foreboding didn't leave her. When she drifted into sleep after a very long time, the image of Anakin being consumed by darkness continued to haunt her, and his voice, accusing her of betrayal, kept ringing in her ears.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the SW universe. All the characters belong to George Lucas. This story was written for fun and meditation purposes only.

A/N: Hi, everyone!

Actually, I wanted to get the beta-ed version first, but I couldn't resist the temptation to post it now. Once again, I apologise for many, many mistakes!

Thank you so much for reading and for your support!

**Chapter Two**

The magnificent entrance hall of the Senate building was enveloped in a veil of shadows, all too complementary to the shadows of doubt and premonition in Padmé's soul. After another Senate session, she was striding towards the exit with her colleague, Bail Organa.

What was Palpatine planning? With each day, the skilfully entangled web of deception became even thicker. Palpatine was like a venomous spider, pulling the strings of fate with perfect precision, and they all were just hapless insects.

She and Bail turned around the corner and headed towards the exit among a dark tunnel of pillars. The enormous mute giants towered above them, and Padmé sensed her powerlessness and her insignificance as clearly as never before. The dumb feeling of uneasiness and foreboding Padmé had been carrying for a long time, intensified even more, for there was no light at the end of the dark tunnel. Even the sky outside was covered with thick clouds, matching all too well with Padmé's uneasiness.

Padmé glanced sideways at Bail. He was frowning, looking exactly as worried as she was.

"I don't understand what is going on," she said, feeling a great urge to share her fears with someone.

"Palpatine got us all fooled," a female voice sounded behind them. Padmé turned around and saw Mon Mothma, the Senator from Chandrilla, and Fang Zar approaching them. A third person was with them. It was a young man with dark blonde hair and astonishingly blue eyes that Padmé had seen only in one person so far. A dull ache in her stomach stirred, and Padmé was overwhelmed with a powerful wave of anguish at this cruel reminiscence of Anakin.

"Hello, Padmé. Hello, Bail," Mon Mothma greeted them warmly. "This is my nephew, Kayle Mentho."

Kayle smiled shyly at them, and Padmé felt her heart beating faster. She saw Anakin, smiling at her through Kayle.

"I am Bail Organa from Alderaan. Pleasure to meet you," Bail said politely, firmly shaking Kayle's hand.

Padmé pulled herself together. "I am Padmé Amidala. It is nice to meet you," she said, stretching her hand out for a formal handshake, but Kayle leaned down and captured it with a tender kiss. The soft touch of his lips on her skin sent electric sparks down Padmé's back, and as she looked into the smiling ocean of blue, she felt her heart doing a mad flip. The same eyes as those of Anakin…

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Senator," Kayle said politely. "You are very beautiful, for a Senator, at least," he said, blushing slightly. Mon Mothma threw him a sharp look. A young handsome man, admiring her beauty – it was an image of another man, and Padmé felt another pang at her heart. _Anakin, where are you? _

"This system of local governors…I wish I knew what Palpatine is planning," Fang Zar said thoughtfully, scratching his chin. With an enormous effort, Padmé brought herself back to reality.

"Why don't we all have a cup of tea at my apartment?" she suggested. It was not uncommon for them to meet after another dubious session and to discuss what possible effects it could have on the galaxy.

As her eyes stopped on Kayle, her heart made another loop. Having some tea with Kayle sounded like a really good idea…The others nodded in agreement, but Padmé saw only Kayle.

"With great pleasure, Senator," he said warmly. Padmé liked his smile.

-----

Threepio had kindly brought the drinks to the guests, and the five of them were sitting on the couches in Padmé's main room.

"The Republic is slowly turning into a dictatorship. This new reform gives Palpatine absolute control over the Senate," Bail said slowly.

"He turns everything upside down. All the things I've fought for don't matter any longer. Justice, peace and freedom – these are virtues we try to gain for the Republic. Instead of bringing them, today we have destroyed another piece of it," Mon Mothma said quietly. She was very pale and seemed to be light years away. Padme knew exactly how the Chandrillian Senator felt. There had to be something they could do…

"I don't know much of politics, but I don't like the direction the wind is blowing," Kayle said. "I don't like Palpatine. He is not a good man."

"You are right," Padmé said vaguely. _If only Anakin hadn't liked Palpatine so much…Kayle didn't. _Padme snapped out of her reverie. Why did she keep comparing Anakin with Kayle? What was she thinking?

"So, Kayle, you are Mon's nephew?" Padmé hurried to change the subject. "I don't recall meeting you before."

In response to her question, Kayle smiled warmly. "I haven't seen my aunt in twelve years," he said. "I was a little boy when I saw her last, so I decided to pay her a surprise visit. I hope you didn't mind, did you?" he asked his aunt.

Mon Mothma grinned affectionately. "Of course not! I missed my youngest nephew, after all."

The way Kayle watched Mon reminded Padmé so much of little Anakin speaking with his mother. The same look of affection and pure, innocent love, the corners of the lips twitched into a slight smile, blue eyes shining with warmness…She missed Anakin so badly. Was he alright? He had to be, for both their sakes…

"Are you all right, Padmé?" she distinctly heard a gentle voice calling her. She snapped out of her reverie again and found herself staring into two blue orbs, looking at her with concern. "You seem to have dozed off."

"Oh, I'm fine. Thank you for your concern, Kayle," Padmé replied, bewildered.

"Are you sure?" Kayle persisted. He put his hand on her shoulder. It felt comforting and soothing. "Maybe there is something I could do for you," he suggested, looking shy.

Padmé looked at his concerned face, and felt time stopping. This man was so caring and compassionate, and full of gentle charisma.

"Maybe there is, young man," Bail said, the tone of his voice mischievous. "Today there is a ball in honour of the introduction of the new law." He paused for a moment, his lips pursued in a thin line. "You could escort Padmé to it. She needs to have some fun."

"Bail, I told you, I'm not going," Padmé began to protest, but was cut by Mon Mothma.

"Padmé, you are a young and stunningly beautiful woman," she said. "You shouldn't waste the best days of your life rotting in loneliness. Even the most beautiful flowers wither and die. Find the sun while you still blossom."

Padmé wanted to retort that she had already found her sun, the brightest in the universe, but then she bit back her remark. Her love for Anakin, infinite and unconditional, was a forbidden one, and even though Padmé trusted these people with her life, they could not possibly know the truth. Anakin was still gone, and no Anakin meant no fun. Besides, Kayle was indeed a very likeable and sympathetic young man.

"I shall come," she said after a slight hesitation.

-----

Padmé stood at the veranda, gazing at the city. The view from the high tower was magnificent, and she found it soothing, just looking at the busy turmoil outside. She remembered the first time she shared this view with Anakin soon after their marriage. But he had had eyes only for her…

It had been four months, two weeks and three standard days since she had last seen him, talked to him, or just rested with him. With each day, the pain of their separation intensified, and she felt herself simply fading away. She couldn't exist like this much longer.

Padmé went to the wardrobe and pulled out a wooden box, carved with symbols of happiness and love. She remembered how she watched Anakin making it for her, his forehead furrowed in concentration. She remembered how worried he had been about whether or not she would like it. How could she not? Watching the expression of utmost happiness, pure joy and unconditional love on his face was one of the brightest moments in her life, when she accepted his gift with shaking hands. This simple box was one of the few symbols of their union, something that was only for them. He had then given her a kiss of love and gratitude, and Padmé had felt herself leaving the galaxy and rising to the stars.

Snapping into the present, Padmé opened the box. Inside were a holo cube and a thin braid of golden hair. She picked up the braid, smiling in reminiscence. A small lock of hair, yet it meant so much for both of them. Padmé would never exchange it for any prized possessions. The braid, simple and beautiful, was the symbol of their undying love for each other.

Padmé picked up the cube and activated it. A flickering blue image of smiling Anakin appeared before her. She took this picture on the night before he left. She caressed his cheek lovingly, but her hand touched just blue air. A single tear ran down her cheek.

"Oh, Ani," she whispered softly. "Please come back soon."

His warm blue eyes looked at her compassionately; his smile was one of reassurance and love. It was as if the hologram was trying to comfort her, to tell her that everything would be alright…

Another pair of blue eyes flashed in her mind, the image of another young man watching her adoringly appeared before her inner eye. Today she would be going out with another man. Anakin was out in the battle field, fighting for justice and trying to restore the peace in the galaxy, and she was going to have fun. But there would be no fun without him…

Yet Padmé couldn't shake the ever-growing feeling of unease. Many men tried to charm her during Anakin's absence, but no one had ever succeeded as much as Kayle did. This young man had a mysterious effect on her she couldn't explain, as her thoughts kept drifting back to him. Her heart belonged to Anakin, and she wished for no other man in her life. Why was she thinking about Kayle? It was not only his striking outer resemblance to Anakin that captured her, there was something else about him that attracted her, something she couldn't put her finger on…

_Maybe the ball will be fun_. Padmé slumped helplessly on the bed and punched it furiously with her fists. Kayle Mentho was no one to her. _No one_.

The sky became even darker, and Coruscant looked very menacing to her. The atmosphere outside was choking and calm, as if a great storm was coming. The feeling of restlessness and uneasiness intensified even more, and Padmé stirred anxiously. Somehow she knew she had to put the HoloNet on…

She reached for the control and pushed the button. The screen activated, and the announcer, a young human female, appeared. She looked very grim, and Padme's stomach gave a panicked jerk.

_"-and we regret to inform you that Master Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker, were found dead only a few hours ago." _

The image of two dead bodies appeared. Padmé looked at them in shock, unable to breathe. Her voice left her.

_"Young Anakin Skywalker, also known as the Hero With no Fear-" _

A large close-up of Anakin appeared on the screen. He was deadly pale, and a thin stream of dry blood run from his mouth. His blue eyes, usually so full of life, were snapped open and looked blankly at the world.

_No, Anakin couldn't be dead…Not Anakin_! Wild tears obscuring her vision, Padmé turned off the screen and slumped onto the bed once more, her body shaking from uncontrollable sobs. She refused to accept it. It was impossible…

But his eyes, usually sparkling with life and glowing with warmth, were now dead and cold. The image of his lifeless body kept swirling before her eyes, as she gave out a helpless cry of anguish.

_Gone…Anakin is gone… _


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the SW universe. All the characters belong to George Lucas. This story was written for fun and meditation purposes only.

A/N: Hi, everyone!

Again, due to the very cruel real life, I decided to update sooner. I'm updating my other story today as well.

I'm so sorry for the lack of time, but I don't have time to reply to your reviews! I've read through them, and I'm very grateful. You lot managed to lift my sunken mood a bit. ;)

Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you enjoy!

**Chapter Three**

Twilight fell upon the city, and daylight was replaced by cold, dead neon glow. Despite endless speeders zooming outside, life seemed to have stopped on Coruscant, at least it did for Padmé. How could life go on without Anakin? It wasn't possible.

Padmé rolled herself in a ball, trying to find some comfort, but there was none. First, she refused to accept the fact that Anakin died. He was a capable warrior, very skilled and powerful. He was the Chosen One, his destiny was to shoo the darkness away, not to be lost in it. And if something had happened to him, she would have felt it. Anakin and she were soul-mates, and if one of them was in danger, the other would sense it. She didn't capture anything.

But then a nasty voice of reason remembered her about the feeling of foreboding, about her dream, about the sense of upcoming danger. She had felt something, and couldn't explain why it sent icy chills down her back, why it clutched her heart in a grasp of despair. Now she knew what it was. Now she knew what it felt like when the second half of her soul would be ripped away.

She didn't know how long she just lay on the bed, her body shaking from uncontrollable sobs, her entire being calling for Anakin. Her pillow was wet from river of tears she shed, and they still kept coming. Dormé must have brought her something to drink, but the steaming liquid had long turned cold.

Anakin was gone, and he would never return to her. He became one with the Force, and maybe he was watching her now, trying to comfort her. But she wasn't Force-sensitive, and she couldn't join the brilliant flow Anakin told her so many times about. What did it feel like, being connected to the Force? She never asked Anakin, and the chance to do it was taken from her.

Yet a large part of her refused to believe that Anakin was gone, he couldn't retreat from this world so simply. Anakin always loved flashy entrances, and it was not his style to leave the galaxy quietly, only with his picture being transmitted per HoloNet. His death would have been more spectacular, and he would have surely exploded a large Separatist space station before going to the netherworld.

Padmé let out an angry half-groan, half-sob and curled even tighter. What was she thinking? Death wasn't a gift, it wasn't something anyone could choose. It just comes to take someone, either unexpectedly, or it is like a venomous spider eating someone's soul till there is nothing left to feed upon…It cannot be prevented, stopped or foreseen. It just happens.

Everything that lives dies one day…The suns can't be stopped from setting…Even the stars burn out…This was the way of the Force, the law that couldn't be broken. Now the brightest source of light in the galaxy was diminished, and it became a much darker place. A colder place, since the warmest sun set down, for forever.

The weeping body of a once beautiful woman on the large bed was inhabited by two persons – a rational Senator Amidala, and a little dreamy, romantic girl. Senator Amidala's sharp mind accepted the bitter truth – a man died accidentally. This man was strong, but not invincible. He fought in the front lines in the horrible war, and he was just another fallen soldier. These sad, yet inevitable things happened everyday.

But Padmé clung to the sweet image of Anakin returning to her. He couldn't be killed simply because he was Anakin Skywalker. Padmé was sure that she would have felt more than just dark foreboding if he had indeed been taken away from her. She didn't feel his presence enveloping and soothing her, as it would have been if he had become one with the Force. Anakin was a bundle of energy, and his energy couldn't be emptied by a simple blaster shot. Goodness, he was just too arrogant to accept such a boring death as being shot by a battle droid.

Anakin was alive, and she knew it. He must have sensed that she was in pain, as he always did, and at the moment he was surely bursting through the front door. The only thing she had to do was to just turn around, and she would see him, standing by door, smiling at her. Her heart began to race, and excitement flooded through her. Anakin was there, she knew it-

The seed of hope blossoming in her heart, Padmé turned around and looked at the door step, expecting to see Anakin, the special smile he gave only to her, to see his brilliant blue eyes…But no one was standing in the door way.

Disappointment was burning in her throat, and Padmé felt as if she had lost Anakin again. Another wave of hot, stinging tears overwhelmed her, and she wept once more, feeling as miserable and lonely as she had never felt before. Maybe, he couldn't come to her because he was on the other side of the Galaxy? That was most probably the reason why he wasn't standing at her door step, but he would return, and she knew it. Would he?

The edge of her consciousness vaguely perceived approaching footsteps, and someone lowered himself on the bed next to her. Padmé didn't know who it was, nor did she care. Even it was Darth Sidious, the mysterious Sith Lord the Jedi were looking for, Padmé wouldn't care. Except if he offered her to bring Anakin to her…

"Padmé," a soft male voice spoke to her.

What did this man want here? Everything she wanted was to be left alone, to be let wail in misery and self-pity, howl for Anakin.

"Go away," she managed to splutter through another fit of sobs.

"Padmé, what happened?"

He couldn't possible understand what happened. Anakin was gone, but these plain words couldn't describe the effect it had on her, for the galaxy. The world seemed to have come to the brutal end for Padmé, and that's what happened.

"Padmé," the voice said again, even softer than before. "Please look at me."

What for? What would she see? Why should she move?

A warm hand touched her shoulder. This touch felt comforting and soothing, and Padmé turned around reluctantly. Brown eyes met blue ones, and Padmé blinked in confusion, her heart beating faster. Could it be-?

"Anakin," she whispered barely audible, her voice hoarse from interminable weeping.

These warm eyes of smiling blue could belong only to one person… Her vision was obscured by the shroud of tears, and Padmé blinked, trying to clear it. She focused on the person sitting next to her, and her heart sank low again, terrible weight of disappointment smashing her once more, for it was not Anakin by her side. It was Kayle.

"It will be alright, Padmé," he said. "Whatever happened, it will be alright."

"How can you say such a thing to me?" Padmé asked incredulously, her grief replaced by anger. "It will never be alright. Never!"

"Things happen and people make through it. I know this is hard for you, but it will get better," Kayle said simply.

_Things happen_. How could speak so casually about it? How dare he estimate the hole Anakin's death left in the Force, in the galaxy, in her soul by two simple words? A barrier broke inside of her, and she began pounding on his chest as hard as she could, trying to hurt him as much as possible. How could he speak like that?

"How dare you? You don't understand anything," she shrieked angrily, streams of tears blinding her. Her eyes were red and puffy, and the hair lay flat, beautiful curls were gone.

A slightly startled Kayle captured her hands effortlessly, and pressed her tight to him, embracing her protectively. Padmé felt as if she were in trance, but the feeling of two strong arms enveloping her was comforting, and she could give in the illusion of being cuddled by another man.

"I know he is still alive," she whispered brokenly. At this moment, she believed in her words.

"I guess we won't be going to the ball tonight," Kayle murmured, stroking her hair. "Pity," he said quietly, but Padmé didn't hear him. His eyes were sending icy sparkles, and his mouth curved into a malicious smile.

-------

Two Jedi star fighters landed on the Jedi Temple landing platform. The cockpits flew open, and two men climbed out of the ships. One of them was clad in a brown cloak, with dark red hair and a short beard he was stroking absent-mindedly. The other man was younger and taller than his companion, with dark blonde hair and astonishingly blue eyes. Two Jedi Masters approached them – a dark-skinned human and a Nautolan alien.

Both newcomers bowed deeply to the Jedi Masters.

"You have summoned us back to Coruscant," Obi-Wan Kenobi said, tiny notes of polite curiosity in his voice.

_About time_, Anakin thought, scowling inwardly, but his facial expression didn't betray anything. He was at last on Coruscant, and would come home, to Padmé…As his thoughts drifted to his secret wife, his senses captured a wave of pain and grief emanating from her. Padmé was suffering, and he was not there with her. It took all his self-restraint not to take off immediately.

"We have traced Taren Meeda, or Kayle Mentho, how he calls himself now," Kit Fisto said. "He is on Coruscant."

Anakin vaguely listened to the conversation, for his attention was glued to Padmé. What could have happened to her? He hoped she didn't believe in yet another ridiculous death rumour. Anakin stretched his senses and reached into the Force, trying to access Padmé and find out what caused her such pain, still overwhelmed by a stream of hot, bitter anguish. He felt a lump rising up his throat, and fought hard to restrain it.

Obi-Wan's lips stretched into a shadow of smile. "Do you know the exact location, Masters?"

Through the Force and the bond of love he shared with Padmé, Anakin felt another presence by her side. He reached further into the Force, and tried to determine who it was. With his inner eye, he saw a bundle of darkness and malice that could belong only to the person they were tracing all these months. _No, it can't be! _He must have been mistaken. Anakin closed his eyes, ignoring the fact that he was standing with three Jedi Masters, and tried again. There was a tinkering dot which was Padmé, and the bundle of darkness was still next to her. _Taren Meeda. Kayle Mentho_. Kayle Mentho was with his wife, causing her so much pain…Anakin felt his fists clenching, there was no voice of reason, no tranquillity in his soul, only wild flames of love and burning desire to protect his wife, to give Kayle Mentho what he deserved. He tried to send his love to Padmé through their bond, but his attempts failed, as the dark presence blocked her from him.

"We do. According to our sources, Kayle Mentho is-"

"at Senator Amidala's apartment," Anakin finished for Mace Windu. He cast a look at his lightsaber, checking if his weapon was still with him.

"How do you know it, young Skywalker?" Mace Windu asked him, his forehead frowned in suspicion. Somehow Master Windu always managed to pronounce his name as if it was an affront. Obi-Wan looked torn between being surprised and being impressed.

Anakin used all the skills he gathered through the years of marriage to remain nonchalant, though his entire being urged him to take the nearest speeder and rush to save Padmé.

"I sensed him through the Force," he said. Well, it was true, even though the fact that Anakin picked up the Dark Jedi's presence was a pure coincidence.

"Well done, Anakin," Obi-Wan said, and despite the earnestness of situation, Anakin was stirred by his former Master's words. It was not often that Obi-Wan praised him, and Anakin knew to appreciate these rare moments. Obi-Wan's opinion meant much to him, more than the opinion of the population of ten largest star systems put together.

Mace Windu gave a tiny nod. "Let's head for Senator Amidala's apartment."

Anakin took off with three Jedi Masters, horrible images of what Kayle Mentho could be doing to Padmé flashing in his head, each more terrifying than the previous. He hoped he would manage it in time to save his wife from that monster. If he wasn't there soon enough, if something happened to her-

Anakin shook his head involuntarily. _No_. He would prevent it for their both sakes. He couldn't live without Padmé, and if she passed into the netherworld, he would just cease to exist.

-----

Padmé lay on the bed, Kayle's arms wrapped protectively around her. She stopped crying simply because she didn't have any more tears to shed left. Anakin was dead, she saw the evidence with her own eyes, and he would have contacted her in some way if were alive.

"I know hard it is to lose someone dear to you," Kayle said softly.

He pulled himself on the elbow and faced Padmé, his deep blue eyes mirroring terrible grief and sadness. Something horrible must have happen to him. A strange feeling stirred in Padmé. First she didn't understand what it was, after spending eternity, as it seemed to her, crying over Anakin. Then she realised that it was compassion.

"Who have you lost, Kayle?" she asked.

For a moment, it seemed as if he would not answer her.

"My mother," he said at last, his bright blue eyes haunted. "She died before I could save her."

Padmé inhaled sharply as she thought of another young man losing his mother. _Anakin_…Anakin had dealt with his loss back at that time so much better than she did now. She thought dumbly if it helped her if she went out and killed Chancellor Palpatine. It was his fault Anakin died…if Anakin had died.

"He will always be with you," Kayle said gently, touching her cheek. "The pain of loss is fresh now, but it will get better. You will see."

"He is not gone," Padmé said. "He is still alive, I feel it."

Kayle just shook his head sadly. "He is gone, Padmé. I'm so sorry, but he's gone for good. You have seen the evidence with your own eyes."

He was right, but Padmé still refused to believe in Anakin's death. It was too sudden, too unexpected, too easy…She had a feeling that there would have been more to it.

"I'm sorry," Kayle said softly.

They looked each other deep into the eyes. Padmé felt herself losing in the ocean of blue, just like that of Anakin. The air seemed to sparkle with electricity between them, as the gaze became even more intense. Kayle leaned down a bit.

"I will help you through the hard time," he said. He looked very shy for some reason. "I like you very much, Padmé."

"I like you too, Kayle," Padmé whispered, as he leaned closer. Their noses almost touched each other. His hands made way to explore her body, and Padmé allowed it. She felt as if she were hypnotised and observed the scene from the outside. Kayle moved to kiss her. An alarm sounded inside of her.

"No, Kayle," Padmé protested weakly, turning her head away. It was wrong. Her heart belonged to Anakin, and would always belong only to him.

Kayle gently cupped her by the chin and made her look at him again. "I really, really like you, Padmé," he said softly, gazing her deep into the eyes, and Padmé felt herself losing into his beautiful eyes. He looked so much like Anakin…

"You are special."

He moved again to kiss her, and Padmé allowed it. She felt as if she were in a trance. It was a tender kiss first, but it grew more passionate with each moment. Time seemed to stop, and Padmé felt herself losing in this kiss, surprised by the softness of his lips. She felt safe and comfortable in his embrace, and her entire being yearned for more-

"In the name of the Galactic Senate of Republic, you are arrested, Kayle Mentho," a dark voice sounded above them.

Padmé heard the familiar humming sound of many lightsabers and broke away from Kayle. She looked up and felt as if the air was drawn from her lungs. She wanted to scream, but her voice abandoned her.

Four Jedi - Mace Windu, Kit Fisto, Obi-Wan Kenobi and … Anakin were standing by her bed, their lightsabers ignited, but Padmé's eyes saw just Anakin. His face, an emotionless Jedi mask, could as well be carved out of stone. His eyes, usually so warm and glowing with love, were icy cold, and looked with contempt at her instead of love.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: After leaving you with a small cliffie, I decided to update sooner than I actually intended. I hope you'll like the chapter!

Note: This story completely ignores the events of Jedi Quest series and all other novels/comics between Episodes I and II.

Many thanks to my wonderful beta Nicole!

**Chapter Four**

Time seemed to freeze, and the absolute silence was broken only by humming sound of four lightsabers. The atmosphere was thick, and tension grew with every second.

_It can't be happening! It's not real!_

Padmé continued to look at Anakin, trying to find the sparkle in his brilliant eyes, desperately searching for a shadow of smile on his handsome features, but his face was blank. Only his eyes were alive, and they were blue whirlpools of such intense anger, pain and … hatred, that Padmé felt as if someone were choking her, as she could barely breathe. He had to know that the kiss meant nothing, and that her heart would beat only for him. Then Anakin blinked, and his gaze became blank.

_This kiss wasn't nothing. You wanted to be kissed by him, _a nasty voice whispered. Padmé ignored it.

"Anakin," Padmé said barely audible, her eyes burning from new tears.

She couldn't stand the way he looked at her, so cold and distant. It would have been so much easier for her if he started screaming and accusing her of betrayal, or even hurting her physically, because she deserved it. But his icy cold and calm demeanour made her feel even worse. Anakin had never been calm, and the fact that he was now, meant that he was hurt worse than ever before. And she was the one that caused him such pain. Before her mind could register what she was doing, she stood up, and her feet carried her to him.

"Senator Amidala, please stand back," she distinctively heard a stern voice calling her. As if in a trance, she turned her head and saw Obi-Wan Kenobi, watching her. Obi-Wan always looked at her with respect and sympathy, but now his eyes were almost as cold as Anakin's.

Padmé faced Anakin again, but his attention was now focused on Kayle again.

"Anakin," she said again. _I love you. Please forgive me. I don't know what came over me. _ His eyes lingered on her for a fracture of second, then skipped back to Kayle. His right, black-gloved hand tightened his grip on the lightsaber, and it hummed mournfully as if it were in pain.

A cold, satisfied laughter sounded behind her back. Padmé turned back and saw Kayle, rising from the bed. _Kayle?_ This man wasn't the Kayle Padmé had met.

"Do you honestly think you can arrest me?" he asked the Jedi. He pushed a button on his bracelet. "Some civilians may be in danger." His lips twisted in a malicious smile, he reached into the inner pocket of his robe and pulled out a lightsabre. He activated the blade. It was red. Colour of the Sith.

"Who are you?" Padmé asked him. Her head was spinning, and she grabbed instinctively a handful of Anakin's robes in order not to fall. The man she felt so connected with was an enemy…

"His name is Taren Meeda," Obi-Wan said dryly. "He is the Dark Jedi that Anakin and I have been chasing for months. We had no idea that he was on Coruscant, getting to know our friend closer, who also happens to be Senator."

"You happen to have a very nice friend, Master Kenobi, Knight _Skywalker_," Kayle said, casting a taunting look at Anakin, who withheld it steadily. Only his jaw tightened even more, and his eyes sparkled dangerously.

Now as she looked at Kayle, Padmé couldn't understand how she could have been attracted to this man in the first place. Kayle's face was cruel and haughty, and his eyes resembled a frozen lake on the always-snowy Hoth, exactly as icy and lifeless. Looking deeper into the pale, deadly blue of the Dark Jedi's eyes, Padmé felt numb coldness overtaking her heart. He didn't resemble Anakin in slightest…

With a sinking feeling in her stomach, Padmé realised that she had been mind-tricked and deceived. Anakin had once told her that it was impossible to mind-trick someone as strong-willed as she was. At this moment, Padmé didn't feel strong at all. Then another thought crossed her mind, a thought that made her hair stand back and want to jump from the highest tower on Coruscant. Kayle was able to mind-trick her because she _wanted_ to be mind-tricked…

The loud noise of shattered glass brought her out of her reverie. Many super battle droids appeared seemingly out of nowhere and opened fire on them. The Jedi started deflecting the blasts back to the source. Padmé ducked instinctively and crawled into the corner, trying to shield herself from the fire. Mace Windu and Kit Fisto launched at the droids.

"Anakin, protect the Senator!" Obi-Wan said to his former Padawan, walking towards Kayle.

"And let you have the fun?" Anakin said in indignation.

In a couple of swift strikes, he beheaded a droid that fired at Padmé, and launched himself at Kayle. The two men became engaged in a heated duel. Very exasperated-looking Obi-Wan jumped across the room and landed near Padmé, deflecting the fire that was sent at them. She thought she heard him murmuring something like _"Why does he never listen?"_

Anakin and Kayle were entwined into a ferocious duel. Both men were incredibly skilled warriors, and their movements were so fluent, that it looked like as if they were encaged in a box of red and blue. Sparks were flying, and hissing sounds of lightsabers clashing and noises of blaster fire filled the room. Padmé could have never imagined that the sanctuary of her bedroom could be turned into the battle field. Master Windu and Master Fisto were heavily outnumbered, and therefore had to retreat into the living room.

"Your feeble skills are nothing compared to the power of the Dark Side," Kayle sneered maliciously. The glint in his lifeless, pale blue eyes was inhuman.

"Asajj Ventress had said just that, and where is she now?" Anakin asked, parrying low. Kayle blocked his strike effortlessly and aimed for Anakin's legs. The Jedi jumped just in time, and making an elegant flip in the mid-air, landed on the floor at Kayle's other side.

"Ventress was weak," Kayle said coldly, swinging his blade in a high arch. Anakin ducked, and in the next moment, the turquoise blade made contact with Kayle's left arm. It started bleeding.

Blood drops fell onto the pale blue carpet. Red as Kayle's blade. Red was the symbol of evil. Symbol of the Sith.

An inhuman cry of fury pierced the air. Kayle launched at Anakin with double ferocity, and two opponents were suffocated by blue and red flames.

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan cried warningly, but he couldn't help his friend, as he was busy protecting Padmé.

The desperate battle of two Jedi Masters and a dozen super battle droids was still raging on, and Anakin and Kayle were still fighting each other. Swinging Kayle's blade aside, Anakin kicked Kayle hard on the ribs, and the other man staggered backwards under the power of the kick.

"You are under arrest, Kayle Mentho," Anakin said emotionlessly. His gaze was opaque, but Padmé believed noticing a gleam of hatred passing in his eyes. It sent shivers down her back. Kayle sat on the floor, breathing heavily.

"You and I are so much alike, Skywalker," he said. His voice could be interpreted as soft. "Both of us are powerful, passionate, and a failure as Jedi. We both know that," he added, seeing a surprised look on Anakin's face. "We can't resist the lure of the Dark Side, and we're right. It holds much more power than the Light Side."

Anakin approached Kayle, his weapon at the ready. "Enough talking," he said firmly, but Kayle's words didn't leave him unaffected. The Dark Jedi noticed this and smiled slightly. His smile made the blood freeze in Padmé's veins. How could she be attracted to this monster?

"You have no one, Anakin. Your mother is dead, your Master never wanted you, and your dearest is unfaithful to you," Kayle said slowly, sneering upon the dazed look on Anakin's face.

Padmé wanted to tell Anakin not to listen to this creature, but her voice refused to obey her. Seizing Anakin's confusion, Kayle extended his uninjured hand and, using the Force, sent Anakin flying across the room. The Jedi landed on the floor with a sickening thud, and his lightsaber flew right into Kayle's outstretched hand. Groaning slightly, Anakin stood up, but Kayle Force-threw Padmé's working table at him, and it hit him hardly on the abdomen. Anakin fell on his knees, gasping for breath. Kayle walked to him and ignited both lightsabers, pointing them at his neck.

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan cried, noted of fear in his voice. It was the first time Padmé saw Obi-Wan being scared.

"She doesn't love you. She believed too easily in that ridiculous rumour of your death, as though she was counting on it to happen," Kayle said in a cold triumph. "And that kiss…I didn't have to try hard to mind-trick her for it."

The soft sky blue of Anakin's blue turned into the dark menacing blue, and his eyes swirled with anger. The air grew thicker, almost sparkling with electricity. Kayle didn't seem to take notice of this change.

"If you hadn't come, this kiss could have been so much more. I felt her yearning, her wanting to get-"

His voice faded, as he was tossed roughly across the room by a powerful Force push. Anakin stood up and called his lightsabre back. He clenched his weapon tightly with his gloved hand. Kayle stood up just in time to block a savage blow from Anakin.

The battle ensued again, and the turquoise and the crimson performed once again their dance of death. Anakin was everywhere; his every step was a powerful strike, driving Kayle mercilessly away. Kayle could barely block the fury of his opponent's attack. Anakin moved with inhuman speed, as dangerous and untamed as sand storms at his home planet Tatooine.

He swung low, aiming for Kayle's lightsabre arm, and the strike wasn't blocked by the Dark Jedi. Still caught in a battle's intoxicating rush, Anakin slid elegantly to the floor, and in one swift movement, cut through Kayle's legs. The battle noises outside stopped, and Mace Windu and Kit Fisto stepped back in the bedroom. They stopped dead in tracks at the sight of the limbless man moaning in pain.

Padmé gasped for air as she looked upon the dead arm, clutching the weapon. It was still activated and humming aggressively. Anakin looked at the crimson blade, the red light mirroring in his eyes. Wordlessly, he extended his hand and deactivated it through the Force.

Kayle watched Anakin hatefully, his face screwed in pain. Anakin approached Kayle, and towered above him, lightsabre still ignited. The Dark Jedi's bloodshot eyes widened in fear.

"You're under arrest, Kayle Mentho," Anakin said evenly. He deactivated his lightsaber, and without casting a glance at Padmé went out of the room, his black cloak billowing behind him. A strained silence was everything that was left in his wake.

-----

Half an hour later, Padmé was sitting at the sofa in Chancellor Palpatine's office, four Jedi standing by his table. She had never felt so horrible, and Anakin had not once looked at her since he had seen her kissing Kayle…

"Padmé, I'm sorry about what happened with you," Chancellor Palpatine said warmly, walking to her. He placed his hand onto her shoulder.

"Thank you, Chancellor," Padmé replied quietly. The hand on her shoulder felt heavy and uncomfortable.

Palpatine watched her apprehensively for a moment, and then faced Master Windu, a look of firm resolve on his wrinkled face.

"Master Windu, Senator Amidala has much authority on the political arena, and I'm afraid that her life may be in danger again," he said. "I'm concerned about her well-being. Would it be possible to put her under protection of your Order again?"

Mace Windu considered it for a moment, then nodded. "Certainly, Chancellor," he replied politely. "We share your worries, and fear too that the Senator's life may be in danger." He paused, scratching his chin thoughtfully. "Knights Offee and Serwun have recently returned on Coruscant. I'll contact them immediately."

"With all due respect, Master Windu," Obi-Wan said cautiously. "Senator Amidala has been through a hard ordeal, and I think she may need friends in these hard days. I propose that Anakin and I serve as Jedi protectors for Senator Amidala again."

Anakin threw a surprised look at Obi-Wan, but the Jedi Master ignored it, though Padmé could have sworn to have noticed a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. Mace Windu frowned, and watched Obi-Wan with a beady eye. Palpatine broke into a smile.

"That's an excellent idea, Master Kenobi," he said. "I think we all agree that Master Kenobi and Knight Skywalker should take Senator Amidala under their protection once more. Or do you have any objections, Master Windu?"

It looked as if the Korun Master didn't approve of the duo Kenobi-Skywalker protecting Padmé again, but Palpatine's smile deprived him of any arguments. He just nodded reluctantly. Anakin finally cast a fluent glance at Padmé, but his face was an expressionless Jedi mask devoid of any emotions.

Palpatine smiled slyly.

"I'm an old man, and I lived many years," he said slowly. "Judging from my previous experience, Padmé may be in a need of female company as well. As her life is in danger, why don't we have a female Jedi guard her along with Master Kenobi and Anakin?"

Mace Windu looked at him with suspicion. "Do you have anyone in mind, Chancellor?" he asked politely.

Palpatine smiled kindly, but his eyes were glinting intricately. "May I suggest Knight Telwis?" he asked timidly.

Anakin, who was watching the exchange nonchalantly, seemed to become intrigued with it. He raised his head in disbelief, and it seemed as if his face were lit by a ray of purest sun ray.

Kit Fisto nodded. "It is a possibility," he said. "Knight Telwis is on Coruscant now. I will contact her immediately."

"Thank you," Palpatine said. "Do you approve the choice of your Jedi guardians, or would you like us to reconsider it?" he asked Padmé.

"No, I'm honoured to be protected by Master Kenobi and Knight Skywalker again, and I look forward to meeting Knight Telwis," Padmé said. Maybe she and Anakin would have a chance to talk, and she would explain everything to him. He would forgive her, and everything would be alright again…

"Matters settled then," Mace Windu said. "May the Force be with you."

He and Kit Fisto bowed and left the room.

"Thank you, Chancellor," Anakin said to Palpatine, bowing slightly.

Palpatine smiled kindly, and patted Anakin on the shoulder. "Anytime, my boy," he said softly. "I'm sure you will enjoy spending time with Senator Amidala, and you haven't seen Dayla for a long time."

Anakin smiled, and this smile lit his features. "For a long time indeed," he echoed. It seemed that he was light years away from here. "For too long," he murmured, and his eyes shined brightly.

Without looking at Padmé, he left the room, an agitated Obi-Wan following him closely. Padmé didn't like the look of happiness and elation on Anakin's face – he was excited about the prospect about spending time with a mysterious Dayla, and Padmé's heart burst from jealousy.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I was a bit surprised at your reactions at Anakin's behaviour. Did you honestly expect him to run to Padmé, hug her and say that he didn't mind being deceived:-P It wouldn't have been much Anakin-like, and then there would be no point in writing this story at all. ;)

Well, this is a short story, and there are maybe six chapters of it left.

Thank you so much for reading and enjoy!

CrazyAni

**Chapter Five**

Due to the fact that Padmé's apartment was damaged and needed repairing, she was forced to stay at a guest house for some time before the Senate would allot her another apartment.

Anakin and Obi-Wan escorted her to the guest house, but neither of them was really talking to her. Anakin continued to ignore her, and Obi-Wan withdrew himself from her as well. The two Jedi were talking in hushed voices in the main room as Padmé was unpacking her things in the bedroom.

Anakin had changed so much since the last time she had seen him. His buzzed Padawan cut had grown into wonderful golden locks, and it fell softly on his face, making him look even more seductive. War had driven the last remains of boyhood out of him, and he turned into a man, a cunning warrior and a loving husband, whose only weakness was immeasurable love to his wife. And how did she repay him for his love?

Her thoughts were interrupted by the door bell ringing. Padmé hurried out of her room, and saw Obi-Wan opening the door to a young Jedi woman. She was a tall human, with her dark red hair made in a neat braid. As her gaze fell upon Anakin, her grey eyes swirled with mad joy, and her face was lit by the brightest smile. Padmé's heart sank deeply, and she almost felt a physical pain as she saw Anakin's eyes shining with equal great joy. His lips stretched into a soft smile, and to Padmé, the dark room seemed to be lit by a ray of sunshine. She gritted her teeth. It was a special smile, reserved for _her_ only…

"Master Kenobi," she bowed to Obi-Wan, for a second averting her eyes from Anakin.

"Hello, Dayla," Obi-Wan said casually. "Thank you very much for joining us on this mission."

Dayla smiled delightedly. "It was my pleasure, Master Kenobi. I respect Senator Amidala, and I haven't seen both you and Anakin for a long time."

Obi-Wan nodded, casting a glance at Dayla that Padmé couldn't interpret. "A long time indeed," he said.

Dayla walked to Padmé and bowed deeply. "Senator Amidala," she said. "It is a pleasure for me to be assigned to guard you."

_It is a pleasure for you to work with my Ani,_ Padmé thought acidly. On the outside, she mastered her best fake smile. "Thank you, Knight Telwis. I hope we will get to know each other well." _I hope I'll find out how you are connected to my Ani_, she added inwardly.

Dayla smiled politely, her eyes burning with purest excitement and enthusiasm. "I hope so too, Senator," she said kindly. "This is my first mission on my own, and I'm glad to be assigned to spend some time with one of the few politicians I respect."

Padmé frowned. "Don't you like politics?" she asked, unable to stop herself.

Dayla shrugged. "I think that all the politicians are just liars. I like a few, but most of them are just corrupted little people who think of nothing but their own well-being."

Padmé wanted to retort something harsh, but the girl's eyes were watching her so sincerely and innocently, that she bit back her nasty remark.

"I suppose we better stop discussing politics for today," Anakin said, stepping between Dayla and her. "Senator Amidala is a skilled orator, and she can make you believe that you see white instead of black." He grinned playfully at Dayla, and the girl blossomed in response. _They must be even-aged_.

They hugged each other, and, in Padmé's opinion, didn't let go for too long.

"Anakin, it's been so long," Dayla said after they broke apart. Then she grinned and played with a lock of his golden hair. "Love the hair."

_You're not the only one_, Padmé thought contemptuously.

"Likewise," Anakin replied mischievously and pulled her by the braid. She laughed melodically, and her laughter was a pain in Padmé's ears.

"Ani, you haven't changed," she said after her laughter subdued a bit.

Anakin raised his eyebrows, glints of amusement dancing in his eyes. "You'll find you're very much mistaken about it, _Knight_ Telwis."

Obi-Wan stepped between them, and Padmé wanted to hug the Jedi Master to death.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you, but we are on a mission," he said sternly, though Padmé could have sworn that she had seen him hiding a fluent grin in his beard. "Anakin, why don't you go to the Temple and grab some of our belongings? I'm dying for a shower and a fresh tunic."

Only now did Padmé notice clumps of mud on the Jedi's tunics, how tired and worn Obi-Wan looked. Anakin's appearance wasn't screaming with fatigue, but the circles under his eyes and bitterness by the corners of his lips told Padmé that he wasn't at his best either. Obi-Wan slumped into a chair and rubbed his forehead.

"Are you all right, Master?" Anakin asked anxiously, putting his flesh hand on his former Master's shoulder. "You look worse for wear."

"I'm fine, Anakin," Obi-Wan said weakly. "This mission had just gotten into me."

Anakin snorted. "Taren got us fooled. We have searched nearly all the swamps in the galaxy for him, and he had been on Coruscant all along."

Padmé shifted uncomfortably. When Dayla entered the scene, the spikes of overwhelming guilt and shame stabbing her heart were replaced by the choking feeling of jealousy. Though, why was she jealous? Dayla seemed to be merely an old friend.

But now the dull ache sprang to life again, and Padmé felt her heart bleeding and hurting so much she wanted to scream. Everything she desired for was to rest in circle of Anakin's loving arms, to hear that he loved her despite what she had done and that he forgave her. But could she ever forgive herself?

The world began spinning around her, and Padmé lost all sense of reality. The weight of betrayal on her shoulders was unbearable, suffocating her and squashing her. Her knees trembled, and she fell onto the couch. The edge of her mind perceived vaguely voices speaking, but she couldn't distinguish words. She just stared blankly in the space.

How could she be so stupid to believe in the rumour of Anakin's death? How could she let herself be infatuated by Kayle's charms, by his good looks? As the image of cold, inhuman eyes resurfaced in her memory, Padmé couldn't understand how she could have been attracted to him in the first place. She had been lonely and desperate, but it was no excuse for what she had done.

Padmé heard vaguely the door hissing, and then a warm hand touched her shoulder. With an enormous effort, Padmé dragged herself back into reality, and found herself staring at Obi-Wan.

"Are you alright, Padmé?" he asked her kindly.

_How can I be alright if Ani doesn't even look at me?_

"Yes, thank you for your concern, Obi-Wan," she said, stretching her lips in a fake, unconvincing smile. She looked around. Anakin and Dayla were gone. "Where is Anakin?"

"He went to the Temple to freshen up a bit. He should return in a couple of hours."

"But Knight Telwis doesn't need to freshen up," Padmé blurted out before she could restrain herself. What was up with her?

Obi-Wan frowned, and his gaze became cold and distant again. "Anakin and Dayla are old friends, and they haven't seen each other for years. They have a lot to catch up."

"Anakin had never told me about her," Padmé said barely audible.

"Why should he?" Obi-Wan asked her, the tone of his voice harsh. "With all respect, he doesn't have any commitment to you, Senator."

"But I'm his … friend!" Padmé yelled. How dare he hide from her the fact that he had had a … female friend?

Obi-Wan surveyed her silently. Then he sighed, and his gaze softened. "I don't mean to hurt your feelings, Padmé, but after the scene Anakin had witnessed at your apartment, he is in desperate need for a good friend. Dayla is exactly the person he needs now."

Padmé swallowed, her eyes burning again, as the weight of guilt pressured on her again, twisting her and making it hard to breathe. "I-," she began, and then stopped abruptly. What was she going to say, anyway?

"Anakin loves you, Padmé," Obi-Wan said softly. "He has loved you since he was a little boy. After Geonosis, I had a feeling that you returned his feelings. But this morning had proven me wrong."

Padmé blinked furiously, trying to stop hot tears, but then a single tear run down her cheek. Soon it was followed by others.

"This morning, he witnessed the woman he loves kissing another man. By a cruel twist of circumstances, this man is the one he had been chasing for months." Obi-Wan paused for a moment. "You have hurt him deeply, Padmé. His wound is deeper than you'll ever realise."

"I know," Padmé said in a small voice. Anakin was always a bundle of energy and never calm and indifferent. Padmé wished he would just let his emotions out and not let them brew inside. One day, he would release them, and Padmé feared that it would consume him, like it did in her dream. And all that would happen only because of her…Unable to hold back her tears any longer, Padmé broke into desperate sobs. She had no idea that a person could have so many tears to shed.

"You must be feeling awful," Obi-Wan said. "And … I can understand you."

Padmé had the feeling that the Jedi Master wanted to say something completely different, but restrained himself from doing so.

"You're taking his side, aren't you?" she asked quietly.

Obi-Wan pondered long before replying. "I'm not taking anyone's side," he said at last. "But my sympathies lie with Anakin." He sighed heavily. "Anakin was never an ordinary Jedi, and his unconditional love to you is a part of who he is. I think he had always hoped that you would return his feelings one day, and maybe you have even given him hope. Anakin has always walked in the skies, and today he crashed into the surface in the most brutal way. His world shattered, and it will take some time before he adjusts to the bitter reality."

"I'm so sorry," Padmé whispered through another fit of sobs.

"I think you both need to talk, Padmé," Obi-Wan said softly. "You need to clear some things out."

Padmé drew a shaky breath. What she had done couldn't be made right by a simple apology. Anakin was the most loyal and devoted person she had ever encountered, and betrayal was the only thing he couldn't understand. Especially if it was she who stabbed him in the back…

Obi-Wan placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You don't need to feel bad, Padmé," he said. "You are a beautiful woman, and a man charmed you. You didn't know he was a criminal."

"But it still doesn't make it right," Padmé contradicted. "It doesn't make it right for Anakin."

Obi-Wan smiled slightly. "You haven't done anything forbidden. You don't have any commitment to Anakin and you are free to kiss whoever you like to. It was a pure coincidence that Anakin had seen you doing that."

_Obi-Wan, if you only knew how much more complicated this story is._

Obi-Wan cupped her by the chin and made her look at him. "You haven't betrayed Anakin, Padmé." Then he laughed softly. "After all, you aren't married to him."

Padmé had never thought before that these simple words could have the effect to tear her heart apart.

------

His quarters greeted him with a glooming coldness. It was supposed to be his home, but his heart didn't lie here. His home was at his mother's side, or with Padmé. _Padmé_… How could she do something like that to him?

When he had seen her together with another man, a traitor to the Republic, Anakin had felt he would explode from conflicting emotions. He forgot how to breathe, how to move his arms, he forgot what his name was – he could just stare at the horrible scene playing in front of him, and the image of Padmé fiercely kissing another man still stood before his eyes.

He had felt as if he had been struck by a bolt of lightning. Then another sensation had awoken in his soul, a feeling he hadn't experienced since his mother died. The night his mother had been taken away from him, a monster had been born inside of him, and it had ordered him to make the Tuskens pay for what they had done. Today, this monster woke up and, sniffing the air delightedly, told him to make Padmé pay for her betrayal. Roaring in anger, it told him to kill Kayle, to choke Padmé, and then destroy everyone who had ever been unjust to him.

Anakin feared this creature, and it took all of his mental power not to let the monster kill Taren. This man was a bad and twisted person, but no one deserved death. If he killed him, he would kill a small part of himself. Taren was not worth it.

Being with Dayla relaxed him, and he was glad to see her again. She was a reminder of happier times, the happiest in his life as a Padawan. But she was also a reminder of one of the most tragic events in his life, and one of the gravest mistakes he had ever committed.

"It doesn't look cosy," Dayla said, stepping into his quarters.

Anakin went to the wardrobe and started packing his belongings. "I don't live here. You know, I tend to spend most of my time either in a jungle or in a swamp."

_And with my wife when I'm on Coruscant_, he added inwardly. His thoughts drifted to Padmé again, and his heart made a painful jerk. The monster snarled venomously, but Anakin pushed him inside. Being with Dayla distracted him from pain, and she was one of the symbols of his innocence, of the times when he hadn't yet carried a monster inside of him.

Dayla laughed. "I know the feeling. But my former Master and I tend to hang out in bars to get information."

She walked around and approached the table full with spare droid parts. She picked a broken transmitter and smiled, lapsing in reminiscence. "You haven't changed at all, Ani," she said softly, turning to him.

He smiled sadly. "I changed too much_." You won't like the person I've become_, he added inwardly.

She walked to him and put her arm on his shoulder, looking him deep into the eyes. Standing so close to her, looking so intense in her sparkling grey eyes brought in him memories he had fought long to bury.

"It's been a long time," he said.

Dayla smiled, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. "Since Tak and Darriss were gone," she whispered, her eyes bearing a haunted look he hadn't seen in her eyes since that night.

Whenever he had been with Padmé, Anakin tried to convince himself that he had nothing to hide, and as years passed, he had even started to believe in it. Giving Dayla a hug, he had a sinking feeling that the past he had been trying to escape from had finally caught up with him. He asked himself dumbly if his marriage with Padmé could survive it.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Here is the next chapter of this story. You know, people, a couple of reviews wouldn't hurt! ;) Many of you have put this story on alert, and hypothetically you should receive 20 reviews per chapter. It costs maybe two minutes of your precious time to press the button "submit review" and scribble two or three words down!

This story is very personal for me, because it deals with the way how I perceive the world of love and betrayal, and I put a small piece of myself into it. If you like, dislike or hate pieces of CrazyAni's soul, I'd really appreciate if you reviewed!

And giving me long and booooring lectures like "you write only for yourself and I should be content with writing alone and see reviews only as a nice extra" or calling me names like "arrogant girl who only wants to get praise". It won't work:P

Anyway.

Thanks for reading, and the more response I get, the sooner the next update will come! It will include the long-awaited Anakin/Padmé conversation, and I'm writing it as we speak. (hint hint)

Enjoy!

**Chapter Six**

The sun hid behind a thick cloud, and Coruscant looked dark and menacing. It was quiet, the eerie stillness before the storm. The ominous shadows from zooming speeders looked like monsters to Anakin, and he felt his confusion growing. He resembled a thermal detonator, full of conflicting emotions, and Anakin felt as if he could explode at any moment. Only one person could make him feel better, and running up the stairs in the Senate building, Anakin hoped that he would be ready to see him.

Chancellor Palpatine was the only person on Coruscant Anakin always felt comfortable with, and he was always welcome in his office. The Chancellor even used to postpone important meetings in order to have time to listen to him, and Anakin was grateful for it. He had never had many friends, and the cruel fate used to take away those dear to him. First Tak and Darriss… then his mother… and now Padmé had betrayed him.

Feeling his heart screeching in pain again, Anakin fought hard to restrain the growing lump in his throat as he pushed the door to the Chancellor's office. To his relief, Palpatine wasn't occupied, and his secretary Sly Moore kindly invited him to come in.

Palaptine was working, and Anakin's heart screeched again at the sight of this kind old man, over-exhausting himself in an attempt to make this galaxy a better place. Then he asked himself if it was possible. The Separatists were the least trouble in this world, and the Force was suffocated by the shadow of corruption and greed. Even the saviours carried monsters within them, and angels sinned.

"Anakin, my boy," Palpatine exclaimed delightedly, rising from the chair and walking to him. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, thank you," Anakin replied politely. His throat was dry, and his eyes were burning with unshed tears.

Palpatine scrutinized him carefully. "I'm so sorry you had to see it, Anakin," he said kindly.

Anakin jerked involuntarily. "How do you-" he started bewildered.

Palpatine smiled slightly. "I can see it in your eyes," he said softly. "You love her, but she doesn't return your feelings."

_If it only was that simple_.

_You got what you deserved_, a nasty voice whispered in his mind. _After all, you betrayed her too._

"I know," Anakin said aloud. "And it hurts," he added in a small voice. _Oh, Padmé, why did you have to do this? I'm sorry for what I had done._

Palpatine put his hand on his shoulder and looked up at him with compassion. "You should move on, my boy," he said simply. "You should find someone you love and be together with this person."

Anakin just stared at him, baffled. "I'm a Jedi, and Jedi are forbidden to form any attachments."

Palpatine laughed and waved his hand in a dismissive gesture. "Rubbish," he said. "All Jedi form attachments, they are just too afraid to confess it. Even the relationship between Master and Padawan is based on attachment, for friendship is based on attachment."

"No," Anakin protested weakly. "These relationships are based on mutual respect and compassion. There is no attachment."

Palpatine watched him, his gaze opaque. "And do you believe in it?"

Anakin sighed. Obi-Wan was so much more for him than a former Master, and he couldn't imagine his life without him. Dayla, Tak and Darriss were so much more than fellow Padawans…

"I don't know," he confessed truthfully.

"Anakin, you never were an ordinary Jedi," Palpatine said softly. "You knew your mother, and you loved her. You belong with the family that loves you, not with a fellowship of stern warriors."

"Padmé is the only one I want to be with," Anakin whispered.

Palpatine took him by the arm and they walked to the large window. Speeders were whooshing by, and in one of them Anakin saw two people, obviously in love with each other. They were laughing at something, the woman holding a little baby girl. It was a picture of idyll, something he could never have.

"Padmé is a very beautiful young woman," Palpatine said gently, watching the speeders zooming by. "She tends to attract a lot of attention from the male population. You are absent from Coruscant for too long to be able to give her what she deserves."

Anakin felt sharp spikes of fear cutting through his heart. Losing Padmé was his gravest fear. What if she met another man and chose that person over him? Maybe, Palpatine was right and it would be better for Padmé to be in a normal relationship with someone who she would see every day and not every few months? But then a voice within him told him that he and Padmé belonged together, he knew from the very first moment he had laid eyes on her.

"I just feel…," Anakin stopped, searching for the right word. It was hard, because he couldn't describe what he felt at that moment – there were too many emotions swirling in him.

"Betrayed?" Palpatine helped.

Anakin looked at him in surprise. "Through all these years I have been able to learn you pretty well, my boy," the old man said kindly. "Betrayal is the only thing that could have shaken you so badly. Alas, it is one of the things that can't be banished from this world. And no one is safe from it."

"I just never thought Padmé would be the one to do something like that to me," Anakin murmured dejectedly._ I betrayed her too, and now we are even. _But this logical thought didn't make him feel any better. The pressure of long buried guilt and pain suffocated him, and for a moment he thought he would collapse in Chancellor's office.

Palpatine looked at him, his kind wrinkled face shining with compassion. "Padmé didn't betray you, Anakin. If two of you were in a relationship, then it would have been betrayal. But Padmé doesn't owe you anything."

_Padmé doesn't owe you anything_. Palpatine had been right about that. Padmé had taught him so many things, and she was the one that pulled him from the abyss all over again. Without her, the monster would have devoured him, and into what creature would he have turned? He owed her his sanity, his inner peace and happiness, but she didn't owe him anything. Maybe, she belonged with someone who would give her something in return, with someone she didn't have to save from the darkness?

"It's hard to lose someone you love," Anakin said. "But it is even harder to be close to something you love, but can't possess."

Had Padmé ever been his? He would always be hers and hers only, but did she ever want him in the first place? Anakin didn't know this, nor did he want to understand. The only thing he knew was that he loved her more than anything in the world, and needed her more than the air itself.

"Nothing lasts forever, my boy," Palpatine said slowly. "Even the stars burn out. The ones we hold dear either die or betray us. Even the people closest to us are capable of betrayal."

He turned to him and looked him directly in the eyes. Anakin saw his own image, the one of confused and heartbroken young man, mirroring in them. "You can trust no one, Anakin."

Palpatine's warm eyes became cold, and for an instant Anakin believed to have seen a yellow glint of malice passing through them. "Trust no one. They all will betray you."

The tone of his voice, heavy and ominous, sent shivers down his back. _They all will betray you_, the voice echoed in his head, and Anakin believed it. _And I will betray them all_, he thought suddenly.

--------

Padmé sat by the window, gazing at the street. The sky darkened, and the atmosphere was the one of upcoming darkness. Obi-Wan went to the Temple, and Anakin was away. Dayla stayed with her, and from the look of it, she was trying to write a report. Padmé could have helped her, as she always did with Anakin, but she felt a gloating delight, watching the girl struggle desperately with paperwork.

"Senator Amidala?" she heard Dayla asking her shyly. Turning around, she saw the girl watching her cautiously. Padmé raised her eyebrows, urging her to continue.

"Does Mubral lie in the Outer Rim or in the Middle Rim?" Dayla asked, blushing slightly.

"Middle Rim," Padmé replied automatically. "Didn't you have Graphic Description of Galaxy at the Temple?"

Dayla grinned. "We did. But my neighbour kept distracting me."

Padme knew only one Jedi who could have behaved so inappropriately.

"It was Anakin, wasn't it?" she asked. "I didn't know he had any troubles with locations."

Dayla snorted in a mixture of amusement and annoyance. "He kept distracting all of us, but managed to capture everything the teacher said."

Padmé didn't like the girl, but curiosity took over. "Were you and Anakin friends?"

Dayla put the data pad down and pursed her lips, lapsing in reminiscence. "Anakin, Tak, Darriss and I were inseparable as Padawans," she began telling her story. "I was friends with the other two since the Crèche, and one day, we came across Anakin. There were rumours in the Temple that the Chosen One was to be taken Padawan learner by Master Kenobi. The majority was outraged by the fact that the nine-year-old would be trained, and that his fate had already been certain. The rest of us didn't know if we would be taken as Padawans at all, and we didn't welcome Anakin with open arms at first."

Padmé listened to the tale closely, recalling Anakin telling her how lonely and lost he had been at the beginning. Dayla looked up at Padmé, her face twisted with embarrassment. "He was very open and friendly to all, but none were to him. I guess people were jealous. Then, one day, I saw him in the Room of Thousand Fountains, and he looked so lost and lonely that I forgot how annoyed I had been with him. I approached him, and we started talking about everything. It didn't take long before he became friends with Tak and Darriss, and the four of us became nearly inseparable."

The young girl paused and stared at Padmé. "Anakin is the most compassionate, brave and devoted person I've ever met," she said. "And I've never encountered anyone as annoying and crazy as him." She chuckled. "He tends to exert bad influence on the others."

Padmé couldn't help but laugh with Dayla. She loved Anakin with all her heart, but his annoying habit to make fun of her drew her crazy. He also seriously lacked discipline, and that's why he was the only Jedi she could ever love.

"Darriss was the most responsible and disciplined person I'd ever met. He had never broken any single rule. Not before he had met Anakin, anyway," Dayla said, grinning from ear to ear. "One day, he persuaded Darriss to _borrow_ some speeders to do some midnight stroll, don't ask me how he managed to do it. Deep in the night, they snuck out of the Temple and went flying in Coruscant. I don't know exactly what happened, but they wrecked their speeders. When they came back, all torn and dirty, they were greeted by their very angry Masters – Obi-Wan Kenobi and Meshok Bulok."

Dayla broke into laughter, and against her better judgement, Padmé joined her.

"The best part is that Obi-Wan had to endure a long, boring lecture from Master Bulok, and Anakin came clean out of it!"

Padmé laughed hysterically, imagining the always composed and dignified Jedi Master Obi-Wan, timidly listening to another Jedi Master criticising him about his Padawan. Then a question popped up in her mind.

"What happened to Tak and Darriss?"

Dayla's laughter died off immediately, and the cheerfulness of her eyes was replaced by a haunted look. "They are dead," she whispered shortly. "And it is my-" she broke off and looked down, suddenly looking very young and vulnerable.

"I'm sorry," Padmé whispered sincerely, forgetting that she disliked Dayla.

"It's okay," Dayla said weakly. "It was horrible at the beginning, but with every day, it got a bit better. Anakin and I supported each other through these difficult times, and I could have never managed it without him."

Padmé frowned. The gleam in the girl's eyes told her that there was more to the story.

"Anakin is the best friend I could have ever wished for," Dayla said vaguely, staring blankly into the space. It seemed as if she wasn't even aware of Padmé's presence. "He is my best friend."

She blinked sadly and lowered her eyes, but Padmé captured something that unnerved her. Dayla's eyes were shining with infinite love and devotion, and her face lit every time she mentioned Anakin.

_She loves him_, Padmé thought with a sinking feeling in her stomach. _And she wouldn't betray him the way I did._

_--------_

Muffled footsteps sounded in the Republic's maximum security detention block, as the hooded figure slowly and unstoppably made her way to the cell. Stopping right behind a heavy durasteel door, the figure waved hand, and the door slid silently open.

A man lay on the floor. His dark blonde hair was filthy, and he was deadly pale. At the noise of the hissing door, he stirred, and his metallic arm gleamed in the dimly-lit room.

The hooded figure approached the prisoner. "It's time," it said, the voice harsh and low.

The man sprang on his feet, the sound of his metallic legs clanking dumbly in the eerie quietness. His icy cold blue eyes shimmered dangerously.

"Thank you, my Lord," he said quietly. "I won't fail you."

The cloaked figure drew back his hood, and the prisoner stared bewildered upon the most horrible face he had ever seen. An old man was standing before him, whose wrinkled face could be called sympathetic if not for his chilling yellow eyes.

"Make sure you don't," the old man growled in a low voice that didn't match his fragile stature at all.

The prisoner clenched his fists. The metal glimmered feebly, and the quiet mechanical noises could be heard in the black silence.

"Skywalker will pay for what he has done to me."

Quiet footsteps were joined by loud mechanical steps, and two figures left the detention block unnoticed by the sleeping guards.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

The shroud of night fell over the city, and darkness ruled the galactic capital. Dayla curled up in the chair and tried to finish up the report about the last mission, but her thoughts kept drifting back to Senator Amidala. During their short conversation, the Jedi sensed a thoroughly hidden wave of dislike and to her utter astonishment, jealousy storming off the Nubian Senator. Could something be going on between Anakin and her?

_Of course not_.

Dayla grinned and shook her head. It was a ridiculous thought, for her mind was playing tricks on her. However, she still felt uneasy at this idea, as clouds of suspicion began to overtake her heart. What if Padmé loved Anakin, and he-?

_It is impossible. She is Senator, and he is Jedi._

A speeder whooshed by, its light blinding her for a second. Dayla stood up and drew curtains shut. Quiet darkness swallowed the room, broken only by rhythmic ticking of chronometer on the wall. Putting the report aside, Dayla lowered herself onto the floor and tried meditating.

She broke her mental barriers and let her self melting with the Force ocean. She listened to the soothing flow of glowing waters, and saw her own light floating in it, among thousands of others. Whenever she was scared or depressed, becoming one with the Force always comforted her and restored her inner balance. Dayla felt her mind leaving her body and joining the Force. Her breathing became low and even, and at this moment, she forgot about Anakin and her desperate love for him. She was a Jedi, and Jedi weren't supposed to form emotional attachments. Meditating lessened the ache in her soul for brief period of time, but as soon as she would finish the session, pain always returned.

She hadn't seen Anakin for years, and she had even forgotten what he looked like. She only remembered his piercing and at the same time soft cerulean eyes, which never left her in her dreams. She would always remember the way how his hands touched her and the way her skin burned from his touch… During all these years, the sharp spikes of love lessened their grip on her heart, and she managed to bury her feelings for Anakin in the deepest recesses of her soul.

But buried emotions overwhelmed her again with a fury of gigantic merciless wave as their paths crossed again, and she felt herself choking from this overpowering flood. Dayla wondered how she managed to move and talk like other people who had no savage turmoil in their souls. Every moment, she expected herself to burst with the power of an exploding star or simply burn out.

She recalled the look of elation on Anakin's face when he had seen her this morning, the way his eyes glowed. Her heart was still beating faster from his smile, and she could still feel his scent, which calmed and intoxicated her at the same time. He was more than happy to see her…

_Could it mean that he shares my feelings? _

A shy seed of hope blossomed in her heart, and the polluted air of Coruscant smelled like flowers to her. Maybe, she didn't have to bury her feelings? After that fateful night, he had told her that it was a mistake and that he was sorry for giving her false hope. They haven't seen each other until today, but Dayla would never forget the most wonderful moment of her life. It could be possible that Anakin looked back too, and that his feelings towards her changed. He was as happy to see her as she was, Dayla was sure of that. Her heart raced faster, and excitement flooded through her so strongly that she felt herself dizzy.

Did Anakin truly share her feelings? The more she thought about it, the more plausible it seemed. Many things could happen with time, and Anakin did change. She could tell that he wasn't anymore the same young man she had parted with five years ago. Her breathing quickened and a slight smile lit her young features.

_I love him … and he loves me._

Her entire being bursting from sudden flood of energy, she had to resist a strong temptation to wake up Senator Amidala and dance with her, or to climb at the Coruscant's highest tower and announce the whole galaxy that she was in love with Anakin Skywalker, and that he loved her too…

She was raised at the Temple since she was a baby, and it was her home. But deep down, Dayla always wondered what would have happened with her if she were brought up in a loving family, with brothers and sisters surrounding her. Would she be a different person than she was now? At nights, Dayla often lay awake and tried to remember what her true parents were like. But her memory was blank. Did she inherit her dark red hair from her mother or from her father? Did her mother have exactly the same grey eyes like she did? She would never find it out. She didn't even know if her parents still lived.

Anakin was different than all the other Jedi. He grew up with his mother; he was loved and taken care of by a parent, not a serene Jedi Master. He knew what shelter of parents arms felt like. Before she had met Anakin, Dayla had never thought much of her real parents, and she felt complete at the Temple. But as they had grown closer, Anakin had started to tell her of his past, tales about his mother. Looking at his eyes shining with love, Dayla had started to question herself if it was right of the Jedi to take babies away from home. The Jedi were missing a piece of soul that couldn't be replaced by meditating or blind devotion to the code. Anakin had shown her a hole inside of her she wasn't aware of, and as time passed, Dayla started to ache for a bond of family instead of belonging to the strict order.

Anakin was the only Jedi who could teach her what living in a family felt like, and he was the only one who could fill the void in her soul with warmness and love. He had never been an ordinary Jedi, and he had a skill of leading people after him, and people followed him blindly. He was a fierce and devoted friend, loyal enough to sacrifice his life for those he loved, and he was loved in return. Spending time with Anakin had changed her, Tak and Darriss, and years of friendship formed an unbreakable bond between them. The two of them would make sure that their friends long gone would never be forgotten.

Anakin was the only Jedi in this galaxy she could love. As she thought back to the beginning, she couldn't tell when friendship grew into hot, passionate love. It just happened, and Dayla didn't regret for any second the choice her heart made. He was special, and he deserved to be loved. It didn't matter to her that she was forbidden to love.

Then a thought crossed her mind, a thought that made her heart drop. Could she and Anakin have a future together? They both were Jedi, and they swore a commitment to the Order. If they gave in to their feelings, and the Council found out about them, they would be expelled. Dayla pondered about it for a moment, then she decided that she didn't care what would happen to her as long as Anakin was at her side. They would have to live a lie, but it was worth it.

Through the Force, Dayla felt anguish and desperation crawling in the room, mirroring exactly her own. She didn't need to reach further into the Force to determine the source of disturbance. Dayla snapped her eyes open and surfaced from the energy ocean. She stood up and walked to the bedroom.

Whimpering was coming from the bedroom, and snapping the door open, Dayla saw Padmé sleeping restlessly. Dayla knew all too well what it felt like to be plagued by nightmares, and her heart concerted with compassion. She entered the room and approached the bed, resolved to break the dream and Padmé's torture.

Padmé moaned heart-wrenchingly, and Dayla extended her arm to shake the other woman's shoulder.

"Anakin, no!" Padmé yelled in her sleep. "I love you!"

Dayla stood rigidly, her hand stretched awkwardly in the air. Blood seemed to freeze in her veins, and her heart stopped beating. She thought she was going to be sick. After what seemed eternity, Dayla half-ran, half-crawled out of the room, keeping her hands over her mouth.

_Padmé loves Anakin…She loves Anakin…_

The world shattered around her, as she collapsed into the armchair, and forgetting about years of Jedi education, broke into sobs.

The night fell down when Anakin returned to the guesthouse. Usually, conversations with Palpatine helped him calm down, but after talking with his friend this time, he grew even more restless. What if the Chancellor were right and he wasn't ever supposed to marry Padmé?

He entered the room. It was pitch black, lit only by occasional lights of the speeders.

"Anakin," a quiet voice called him from the darkness. He turned around and saw Dayla curled up in a chair. She was pale, and only her eyes were gleaming brightly. The same gleam he hadn't seen since that night.

He approached her. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine." She jerked towards the bedroom. "Senator Amidala is asleep. I think she's plagued by nightmares."

Anakin sighed inwardly. He knew Padmé and he had to talk, but he didn't think he was ready to face her, to listen to her apologies. He also had one confession to make, one he had been mastering courage for for three years.

Dayla stared at him. Her gaze was harsh. "Why does she keep calling your name in her sleep?"

Anakin stopped dead in his tracks. Dayla was calm, and that's what unnerved him – she was never calm.

"Padmé and I are very close friends," he said heavely. Well, it was truth from a certain point of view. They were only too close for friends. "She has been through a terrible ordeal, and now she needs her friends."

Dayla simply gazed at him, her eyes void and emotionless. "Only friends?" she asked him, her voice hollow.

Anakin lowered his eyes. He knew that he had to tell her everything, but he didn't have the heart to do it yet. Dayla continued to scrutinise him.

_Anakin, no!_, Padmé's voice erupted from the bedroom. Dayla's lower lip trembled.

"Go to her," she said quietly, not looking at him. "I'll be downstairs."

With these words, she stormed out of the room before he had had opportunity to stop her. The door hissed angrily in her wake, and choking silence spread over the room, broken only by Padmé's whimpering.

Anakin entered the bedroom and saw Padmé tossing restlessly in her sleep. Her forehead was covered with sweat, and she kept calling him. His heart ached at the desperate tone of her pleas, and he had to restrain a great urge to run to her and cradle her in his arms, to tell her he loved her despite everything.

Cautiously, he sat on the edge of her bed and gently shook her shoulder. "Senator Amidala," he called.

Her forehead was wrinkled, and tears were streaming down her cheeks. He stroked her cheek and squeezed her hand.

"Padmé, wake up," Anakin said softly.

At the sound of his voice, her enormous brown eyes snapped open, and she stared at him in shock, her face screwed with fear.

"Ani, is that really you?" she asked quietly. "Or will the darkness suffocate you?"

Padmé looked so young and vulnerable at this moment, that Anakin forgot his anger towards her for a moment. She was suffering, and he only made her suffering worse.

"It's me, Padmé," he replied, stroking her lightly. "Everything is alright."

Padmé whimpered and flung herself into his arms, still trembling from the dream. She was clutching at him so tightly as if she wanted to melt into him. Anakin closed his eyes and drew a shaky breath.

"Ani, I'm so sorry," Padmé murmured into his tunic. She pressed herself onto him even closer. "I'm so sorry."

A vision of Padmé fiercely kissing Taren flashed before his eyes, and involuntarily, he jerked away from her. Two bodies entwined into a hot, passionate embrace…He released himself from Padmé's grip and walked away from the bed, facing a dull grey wall.

_She made a mistake. It happens._

But he could never think that Padmé, the woman he loved beyond anything, could deceive him.

_You deceived her too, don't forget it_.

"Why, Padmé?" Anakin asked flatly, still surveying the wall. He couldn't bring himself to face her, to see her heartbroken face. He couldn't stand tears in her brown eyes.

"I don't know what came over me," Padmé whispered. "I-," she started to speak, then broke off.

A strained silence ruled the room, and Anakin could hear his own heartbeat. A loud sob rang out like a canon fire. Padmé was crying, and he behaved like a stranger…he did nothing to ease her pain, he only made it worse.

"There were rumours of your death," Padmé managed to say between the choking sobs. "I saw your body, Ani. I thought you were dead."

_I thought you were dead_. These words slapped Anakin hard across the face, and he had to lean on the wall to prevent himself from falling over. She believed in a preposterous death rumour. Their love was so strong that they felt each other's emotions even if they were apart. It was a sacred bond that he treasured above all. Whenever he was in a battle field, he could still feel Padmé by his side. Even the mere reminiscence of her spread warmth over his soul and helped him through most desperate hours. He had believed that she felt the same.

_She believed in my death because she doesn't feel a bond between us. _

Anakin run his hands through his hair. His breath was ragged, and tried to reach into the Force to calm down. But it didn't help.

_She doesn't love me as much as I do her._

He refused it to be true. They were meant to be together, he knew that. On the other hand, she didn't want anything from him at the beginning. When did she fall in love with him? On Naboo, among the beautiful green meadows? Or was it on Tatooine, when his mother had died? He was good-looking, and Padmé could simply be attracted to him because of his good looks. As for his breakdown after his mother's death, Padmé had probably only shown compassion and sympathy for him. She did confess him her love on Geonosis under the fear of death. Was it love at all? Deep, consuming love that captures one's heart and makes it impossible to think straight, to breathe evenly?

_Maybe, she doesn't love me at all._

A blinding flash of white light exploded in his head at this thought, and he gave out a pained cry. He punched madly at the wall with his flesh hand, and the stone cracked under the power of his blow. Dust enveloped him in a cloud, and his vision was obscured. He felt numb and cold.

A stabbing pain in his hand brought him back into the present. He looked down at it. It was bleeding. Red drops of blood fell onto the carpet. Red was a colour of love. Love he felt for Padmé and she didn't for him.

"Ani, your hand," Padmé squeaked anxiously.

Anakin snorted and turned around. She was staring at his bleeding hand in fear. _She is afraid of me_. Anakin clenched his hand in a fist and laughed bitterly.

"You thought your husband were dead and jumped at the first man you laid your eyes on?"

Padmé stared at him in shock. Her mouth was half-open, and tears were storming down her cheeks like waterfalls on Naboo where they have sworn eternal love and loyalty to each other. Only their eternity didn't last long.

"It's not like that at all," Padmé choked out. "You were gone for so long, and I missed you so terribly-"

_You were gone for so long_. The rest of her sentence sank into nothingness, as Anakin mused over her words. He was usually gone for months, and spent only few days on Coruscant. Maybe, Chancellor Palpatine was right and they didn't have a future together. Maybe, Padmé deserved someone who would be by her side every day, someone who would comfort her after a nightmare and not be the cause of one?

"Ani, I love you," Padmé said desperately. "It won't happen again."

_Even the closest persons to us are capable of betrayal_, Palpatine's words rang in his ears. If Padmé was capable of it once, she could do it again. He didn't know what secrets the future held.

"Would this kiss have become more?" Anakin asked in a muffled voice, uncertain if he wanted to know the answer.

He surveyed her intensely, determined to see her reaction. Although he was angry and confused, Anakin couldn't help but admire how beautiful she was, even with her eyes red and puffy. The way her wonderful curls framed her face, making her look both fragile and powerful. He felt himself falling in love with her even more with each heartbeat, but he had never been as uncertain as if he was now as to if she returned his feelings.

Padmé averted his eyes and pursed her lips. _Please, say no. Please, say no._

The chronometer clicked rhythmically and seconds passed, but she still hasn't answered his question.

At last, she looked up, her gaze haunted and full of guilt. His heart made a painful leap. "I don't know," she whispered barely audible. "Oh Force, I don't know."

A new fit of tears overcame her, and she broke again into loud, desperate sobs. Anakin wanted to lower himself on the floor and weep with her, but he was too numb. His eyes burned, but there were no tears in his eyes.

_It's time to confess her_.

"You were mind-tricked, Padmé," Anakin said evenly. His consciousness screamed that strong-willed people like his wife were nearly impossible to mind-trick, but he ignored it. He inhaled deeply, mastering courage for his next words. "But _I _wasn't when I deceived you."

Padmé looked baffled at him. "What?" she asked, forgetting about her tears.

"Dayla and I were intimate, Padmé," Anakin said, a wave of shame and guilt washing over him again as he heard a phantom girl voice confessing her love to him, her grey eyes looking at him pleadingly.

Padmé's brown eyes were harsh and bitter. Anakin hated to break her heart two days in a row. "When?" she asked simply.

Anakin sighed and run his hands through his hair again, dishevelling it even more. "Five years ago, after Tak and Darriss died."

The memories of that fateful mission flooded into his mind. Green eyes staring glassy at him…Dayla's piercing shriek…The explosive sound of blaster fire and Tak's wide eyes watching the death coming at him…

Padmé laughed. It was a cold and somewhat insane laughter. "You're angry with me because I kissed someone, and you slept with another woman?"

"I made a mistake," Anakin said sincerely.

Padmé stared at him. Her gaze was opaque. "Get out," she said shortly. "I don't want to see you."

"What? Padmé-" Anakin stared, but his words were drowned in a piercing shriek.

"Get out! Out!" She threw a pillow at him, then another. Feathers were flying everywhere.

Looking at Padmé's red, fury-stricken face, Anakin backed away from the room. A loud cry reached his ears as he was at the door, and then a lamp hit him hardly on the back. As the door slid behind him, he thought he heard her howling madly.

A/N: I'm terribly sorry for the delay! I actually wanted to post this chapter on Tuesday, but my computer seems to have some problems, and I can't even log in. (?) My friend, Idrelle, is posting it for me. Thank her very much! ;)

Thank you so much for your lovely reviews! I enjoyed reading very much, but I can't reply to you – lack of time and my mysterious inability to log in stop me.

I was a bit surprised that you didn't recognise the prisoner at the end of the last chapter, though. Think a bit, who had lost two legs and two arms in chapter four? A small hint: Anakin sliced this person in anger because he had busted him kissing his wife. (wink wink)

Next chapter tells what exactly happened between Anakin and Dayla five years ago (this means two years BEFORE Anakin and Padmé had met and married) and Padmé's reaction to it.

I'll update soon, but I can try to do it VERY soon if I get a couple of reviews. :D

Come on, people, logging in and posting a review takes about two minutes! (Assuming you can log in) Only two minutes, and you make CrazyAni very happy. Heheh. ;)

Till next chapter!


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: **So, here is the backstory of Anakin/Dayla relationship! If you hate Dayla, you might get bored to death while reading. ;)

I'm writing the next chapter as we speak, but as always, the real life keeps intervening with my plans. It might take a while till next chapter is up.

You might have not had the time to read the previous chapter, so feel free to review either each chapter separate, or both of them at once!

(BTW, my beta disappeared mysteriously, and as you might know I'm not a native speaker – just wanted to warn you:D)

Enjoy!

CrazyAni

**Chapter Eight**

Dayla sat on the floor before the suite Padmé resided in. Anakin and Padmé…How were they connected? After she had overheard Padmé calling for him, she was certain that the two of them were more than mere friends.

_More than friends_. Were she and Anakin more than friends, too? Or were they best friends who had just crossed the line? Her thoughts drifted back to the night that happened nearly six years ago. The night she would always remember.

_Water was splashing merrily in the fresher, and standing under the hot stream, Dayla hoped that it would wash away her grief. She closed her eyes and massaged her head. Memories of past days flashed through her mind, each making it impossible for her to breathe. _

_How elated she had been when the Council sent four Jedi teams to capture the bounty hunter duo, Geed and Eklan Amedda…_

_How worried she had been when Tak and Darriss had been kidnapped by the bounty hunters…_

_How she and Anakin had snuck out of the camp at night past their Masters to try and rescue them…How they had fallen into the trap and joined Tak and Darriss in the execution cell…_

_Tak's wide eyes as he had watched the death taking him…She would always remember the way his bright green eyes turned glassy and lifeless…_

_Darriss's calm demeanour before the execution…He had always beena by- the- book Jedi, and he tried to find the inner balance and accept the death as a part of the life circle. His face was always calm and serene, and it remained this way even after he had left his corporeal shell…_

_Darriss had accepted his death, but Dayla hadn't, and neither had Anakin._

_She switched off the water, and grabbed a towel. After drying up, she looked at herself at the mirror. Only days ago, a mischievous and carefree girl with vivid grey eyes had been staring back at her. Only few days passed, and they changed so much…_

_Damp hair fell on her face, and she had circles beneath her eyes. Her gaze was flat and listless, reflecting a great sadness. Her face still had girly features and screamed with innocence, but she felt ancient and dirty._

_If only she and Anakin had not been so reckless and waited for their Masters, Tak and Darriss would still be alive. They would now have a sparring session and Tak and she would make fun out of Anakin's crazy stunts. Darriss would look at them disapprovingly, calling to the voice of reason, but the corners of his mouth would twitch in a slight smile._

_Tak's smiling face and Darriss's mature glance swam before her eyes, and Dayla slid onto the floor, unable to stand any longer._

"Death is the part of life, Padawan"_, her Master Sera Caleb had told her. "_Believe in the Force, and let go of pain."

_But Dayla couldn't let go. She hadn't merely lost two friends, she had also lost a piece of her soul. Tears streamed down her cheeks in rivers, and she couldn't stop them no matter how hard she tried. The void in her soul was singing mournfully to her, and the choking feeling of misery overwhelmed her. Her Master advised her to seek for help in the Force, but listening to the lament of the glowing sea made her heart bleed even more. _

_A bitter howl erupted from her throat, and cold chills run down her spine. It was cold, so cold without Tak and Darriss in her life…_

_Anakin. She needed to see Anakin. Only he could understand what she was going through, only he could make her feel better. _

_As if in a trance, Dayla got up and put her nightgown on. Shuffling her feet, she walked towards the exit, and the door slid away silently. Tears were obscuring her vision, and everything was blurry. Indistinct shadows passed her in the hallway, but Dayla didn't notice them. Her feet carried her towards her destination, and she followed them blindly._

_She halted before a dull, grey door like thousands of others at the Temple. But the person residing behind this door was unique. He was everything she had left. She had always loved him in the way a Jedi shouldn't, and in these desperate times, her feelings grew even stronger. She pushed the button, and the door moved aside. Dayla stepped in._

_Anakin sat on the floor, spare parts of diverse mechanisms scattered on the floor. He looked as devastated as she did, but he didn't shed a single tear. Anakin used to bottle up his feelings and boil on the inside, not sharing his worries and fears with anyone. He didn't look up when she entered, but she was sure that he was aware of her presence. _

"_I've wanted to build my own power generator for ages," Anakin said flatly. "Fixing and building things always helped me, but it doesn't now."_

"_Anakin," Dayla whispered hoarsely. She had a feeling as if her heart was on fire and hurting so intensely that it was impossible to breathe. _

_Anakin finally looked up at her. "Are you alright?" he asked her gently. _

_She shook her head, desperately trying to suppress her sobs, but they just burst out of her. Anakin walked to her and scooped her in his arms. "I miss them too," he said softly._

_Her shoulders shuddered, and unable to keep her emotions any longer, she allowed to let them out. The Code didn't matter to her, and she didn't care that clinging to the past wasn't the Jedi way. Anakin would never judge her for that. _

"_If I only hadn't been so reckless," she choked. "It's my fault they died."_

_Anakin cupped her by the chin and made her look at him. His eyes, formerly a brilliant blue, were haunted and the sparkles were gone from them. "It's not your fault alone," he said quietly._

_His eyes were gleaming peculiarly, and his lower lip trembled, as he stared at her tear-stricken face. "They have left this galaxy…left us."_

"_They have become one with the Force, and so they will always be with us," she corrected him, though she had never felt so alone and so miserable before._

_Anakin blinked several times, trying to cast down tears that were welling up his eyes. "I don't feel them," he said quietly. "I tried to trace him in the Force, but I couldn't…I couldn't-" _

_He broke off and lowered his head, but Dayla could see silent tears pouring down his face. He looked so young and vulnerable, and her heart ached for him. His grip on her tightened, and they were clutching each other desperately, searching for a source of comfort and forgiveness. _

"_I couldn't either," she admitted truthfully. "I feel so alone. I'm so glad to have you by my side, Ani."_

_Instead of replying to her, Anakin pulled her closer, and she felt his body shuddering. Soon, a pained cry left his throat, and he buried his head on her shoulder. He suffered as much as she did, if not more. Dayla pressed tightly on his chest and took his scent in. It sent warm soothing waves over her, and only now did she realise how close to each other they were standing. The absolute quietness ruled the room, interrupted only by their harsh, heart-wrenching sobs._

_She didn't know how long they stood like this, rocking each other back and forth, clinging to each other in an attempt to fill the screaming, black void in their souls. Eventually, her breathing returned to normal, and her crying slowed and then ceased. _

_Anakin pulled away. "Sorry," he said, without looking at her. "You came to me for help, and I let everything out on you."_

_Dayla smiled through tears. "You helped me, Anakin," she said gratefully. "And I hope I was able to help you, too."_

_Anakin looked at her the way he never did before, and his facial expression made her body tingle. His face was gleaming with tears – his tears and her tears. He continued to survey her silently, his gaze getting more intense with each instant, and Dayla felt herself losing in the deep whirlpools of his astonishingly blue eyes. He put his hand on his cheek, and she felt her skin burning from his touch._

"_You're my best friend, Dayla," he said gently. "I love you."_

_Dayla drew a shaky breath, and the world began spinning around her once more. _

"_I love you, too, Ani," she whispered, her heart wrenching painfully at her words. _If you only knew how much.

"_I will always love you, no matter what happens," Anakin continued, stroking her cheek with his thumb. "Always."_

_Her eyes burned again, and vision became blurry. Unable to resist the turmoil of emotions, she gave a tiny sob, which was soon followed by others. Anakin looked at her with concern._

"_What is it, Dayla?" he asked her, the softness of his voice melting her. _

Oh, Ani, I can never tell you

_Finding herself at loss of words, Dayla put her head on his shoulder and drew her arms around his neck. Being so close to him filled the emptiness in her heart, but tormented her even more at the same time. Wordlessly, Anakin wrapped his arms around her, his forehead wrinkled in worry. It was too much to take – first Tak and Darriss, and then Anakin telling her that he loved her, but not the way she did. _

_As if in dream, Dayla reached up and shyly brushed her lips against his. Her mind demanded to stop it, but she continued to cover his face with kisses, not bothered by the fact that he wasn't kissing her in return. She had a feeling as if it were stranger's lips that explored Anakin's face, the arms of another person that rubbed circles on his back._

_Anakin pulled gently away. "What are you doing, Dayla?" he asked her quietly, his eyebrows raised in confusion._

"_Don't you know?" she asked quietly, attempting to make a brave smile. She failed._

_Anakin's eyes filled with immeasurable sadness and misery. "Dayla-" he began after several long moments, but she cut him off._

"_You said you loved me," she cried desperately, tears pouring from her eyes. She knew she was embarrassing herself, but she couldn't help it, as frustration and hot passion caught up with her._

"_I do," Anakin said earnestly, the tone of his voice gentle. "But not the way you love me."_

_Her heart breaking into thousand of pieces, Dayla hugged Anakin tightly, and he returned the hug. She could feel his heart beating against her own. _

"_Kiss me if you care about me," Dayla whispered, her tone almost pleading. "Just a kiss-"_

_She captured his lips hungrily with her own, each fibre of her soul begging for him to return the kiss, and after what seemed an eternity, he did. In her mind, Dayla knew that he didn't mean it, but her heart was performing a mad dance of joy. The kiss grew more passionate, and for the time being, Dayla forgot about everything – she could only feel Anakin kissing her, and it was all that mattered._

_She reached into the Force, and the feeling of terrible sadness and uneasiness unleashed on her. The waters of the Force were screaming in pain so cruel that it nearly suffocated her. After a second she realised that the suffering was emanating from Anakin, and his emotional condition shook the Force._

He is the Force_, she thought suddenly._

_The wave of sharp pain and desperation flooded over her once again, and then, a barrier appeared before her, blocking her. Anakin's hands made way to explore her body, and he was clinging to her so tightly as if he was afraid to collapse if he let go of her. _

_Never letting go of each other, they stumbled towards the bed, and Anakin gently pushed her down. She saw a peculiar gleam in his brilliant blue eyes, and at the next moment he crumbled his mental shields and let the Force envelop them. Dayla opened her mind to his, and bathed in his bright Force light, she felt all her dreams coming true…_

"Dayla?" a tentative voice spoke behind her.

With a great effort, she pulled herself back to the reality and turned around. Anakin Skywalker stood before her, his eyes radiating the same sadness like at the night she would always remember.

"How is Padmé doing?" she asked him emotionlessly.

Anakin sighed wearily. "I don't know," he said heavily. "We need to talk."

"What about?" she asked him gloomily, though she thought she knew what would be coming next.

"You should know who Padmé really is."

Dayla stretched her lips in a thin smile. "You don't have to tell me anything, Anakin."

He lowered himself on the floor next to her and ran his hands through his hair, looking very tired. There was a silence that stretched into minutes, and Anakin still hadn't told her anything. Dayla didn't know how she felt about it. On one hand, she was bursting from impatience to learn her place in his life. On the other hand, she still clung to the ray of hope that Anakin might have returned her feelings, and somehow she knew that his confession would diminish this feeble light. They just sat silently next to each other, but this silence wasn't a comfortable one.

At last, Anakin chuckled quietly. "I don't know where to begin," he confessed. "It's complicated."

"Do you love her?" Dayla asked, her voice barely more than a whisper. The words have left her throat before she had had time to think over.

Anakin smiled slightly. It was a sad smile, yet full of infinite love and devotion. "I love her more than anything in this universe."

Dayla's heart sank somewhere to the region of her navel. Numbness took hold over her, and black circles danced before her eyes. "Who is she?" she distinctly heard her own voice asking as though from under the water.

"She is the only light in my universe. She's the air I breathe and the strength that flows through me," Anakin said vaguely, his eyes bearing a far-away look.

He looked her deep in the eyes, and his eyes were sparkling like two brightest stars in the black infiniteness of space. "She is my wife."

_She is my wife. Padmé is his wife. He is married. My Ani is married…_

One thought after another crossed her mind, and the choking feeling of despair returned. The dancing circles before her eyes turned into black puffs of smoke, and Dayla's head ached so much it was impossible to breathe. Vaguely, she felt two arms grasping her by the shoulders and laying her down.

Black smoke turned into a flash of blinding light, and the edge of her consciousness perceived someone inhaling loudly, almost hysterically. Then she realised that the sound belonged to her.

"Dayla?" she heard a voice calling her as it seemed to her from somewhere in the Outer Rim.

She blinked several times, and her vision cleared slowly. A blurry figure bent over her, and a pair of blue orbs drifted into her sight range.

"Are you alright?" a voice asked her anxiously. She knew this voice. It was the best music to her ears.

"Are you happy with her?" she asked him weakly. Her head ached terribly, and her soul screamed.

"What?" Anakin asked, perplexed.

"Are you happy with her?" she repeated her question, her voice growing weaker with each second.

Anakin smiled slightly. "She makes me happy," he said softly, but his eyes bore a pained look.

Dayla made a strange sound, a mixture between a sniff and chuckle. "Congratulations," she managed to say.

Her heart bleeding, she threw her arms over his neck, and he hugged her tightly in response. Dayla closed her eyes, the black feeling of hopelessness and despair claimed her again, and she could almost hear her heart breaking into pieces. The pain she experienced was also physical.

------

For what it felt like hundredth time in three days, Padmé lay on her bed, sobbing madly.

_Dayla and I were intimate_. His voice rang all over again in her mind.

How could Anakin do that to her? How could he make love to another woman? And the way he treated her given that she had only kissed another man?

Through her life on the political arena, Padmé experienced many feelings, from triumph to anxiety, but betrayal had never been one of them. A person dearest to her stabbed her in the back, and the pain was unbearable.

Padmé thought of Dayla, the way her eyes shone each time Anakin's time was mentioned. She recalled again the look of elation on Anakin's face when he had seen the young Jedi. She felt a strange uneasiness at the sight of two of them, looking intensely at each other, but she could never imagine in her wildest dreams that they had had a relationship.

_Dayla and I were intimate_.

Did he kiss Dayla exactly the same way he kissed her? Did he whisper the words of love into her ear when they were united? Did his eyes shine like stars during that night as they did whenever he loved her? The unwanted images of Anakin and Dayla together swirled in her head, each more horrible than the previous, and Padmé felt herself bursting from jealousy.

Padmé looked around the room – the layer of feathers covered the floor, and pieces of shattered lamp were scattered all over the room. Anakin's pained face swam into her mind's eye, and Padmé felt a stab of shame. Even if Anakin had made a mistake, it was wrong of her to behave as hysterically as she did. She should have given him the opportunity to explain himself. After all, she wasn't exactly innocent, either.

_Anakin wasn't married to you when he deceived you_, a quiet voice whispered in her head.

Padmé sat up on the bed and gripped her head tightly. Was it deception at all? Technically, at that time he didn't have any commitment to her. Why was she so mad at the idea of him being with another woman before her? And she didn't preserve herself for him on purpose either.

But still, how could he be so cold and distant to her while he didn't have a pure consciousness? She didn't get intimate with Kayle – it was only a kiss.

_But if Anakin hadn't come in, it would have been more than a kiss,_ the voice contradicted her.

The venomous spikes of guilt regained their grip on her, and the infamous sour taste in her mouth returned.

_You were unfaithful to him, but he didn't do anything forbidden. _

Her chest tightened, and the air left her lungs, as she thought about Kayle's seductive speeches and Anakin's shocked face. Padmé stood up, and wiping her tears with her sleeve, walked to the exit. She and Anakin had a lot to discuss.

The door moved silently aside, and Padmé stepped into the hallway. As her gaze fell onto two figures, sitting by the door, blood seemed to freeze in her veins.

Dayla's head rested on Anakin's chest, and he bent down to her. They were entwined in a tight embrace, his hands rubbing circles on her back. Were they going to kiss?

As if struck by a bolt of lightning, Padmé stood still, and neither of them noticed her presence. It seemed to her that she stood there for years, but in reality only few seconds have passed. Feeling as if she was going to be sick, Padmé turned around and ran down the hallway to the exit.

"Padmé!" she heard Anakin's voice calling after her, but she only fastened her pace.

Choking with a new wave of tears, she ran out of the guest house and headed outside with no fixed idea where she was going to. Rain was pouring madly, and water splashed under her feet.

How could Anakin lie to her? They were married for three years, and he kept telling her at every opportunity how much he loved her. But as soon as his first lover returned, he chose Dayla over her. Her heart breaking again, Padmé ran randomly through the Coruscanti streets. It was already dark, and the way before her was only lit by feeble lights of occasional speeders. Her hair was wet and hung loosely on her face, and her cheeks were wet from strong rain and her tears.

_Anakin, how could you betray me?_

Sunk deep into her thoughts full of misery, Padmé didn't notice a man standing in her path as she bumped into him.

"Sorry," she choked, determined to run away, as far away from Anakin as possible, but the figure gripped her tightly by the elbow. It hurt.

Baffled, Padmé raised her eyes and found herself staring into a pair if icy cold blue eyes. With a sickening feeling in her stomach, she recognised the eyes' owner. A strange gleam caught her attention, and as she cast a glance down, she saw drops of water running on a metallic surface. This man had two mechanical arms.

"Kayle," Padmé whispered incredulously, a savage panic rising in her. Several battle droids, armed with heavy blasters, surrounded them.

He grinned maliciously. "And so we meet again, Senator."

She heard a quiet clanking noise, coming from the pair of magnetic binders being put on her.

"Lead her away," Kayle ordered, his voice as cold and expressionless as ice.

"Anakin!" Padmé shrieked desperately.

Her captor sneered gleefully. "He won't come for you."

"Because he doesn't love me," Padmé said dejectedly.

Kayle laughed loudly. "No, he loves you," he said, his inhuman face bearing a disgusted expression. "That's why I'm wasting my time to get you."

"What do you want me for?" Padmé whispered her mind numb.

Kayle clenched his metallic fist. "To repay him for what he did to me," he said shortly. "I have waited too long. Unfortunately, you were under close surveillance until now. I think I should thank the Force that you ran away."

Second time in a few minutes, Padmé thought she was going to be sick. _It is a trap for Anakin, and I'm the bait. _

"Anakin won't fall for this," she said firmly, though her insides were squirming with fear.

"Oh, he will," Kayle said with a mock gentleness in his voice. "He loves you too much."

_I'm so sorry, my love. I've been foolish. _

Kayle's hungry eyes ate her body. Suddenly, Padmé felt very insecure. She was clad only in a nightgown, and it adhered to her slender body from the water, revealing each curve of it.

"In the meantime, we can continue where we broke off," he said maliciously, tracing his metallic finger back and forth her bare arm. The feeling of Kayle's artificial fingers on her body felt so different as when Anakin touched her…

A wave of blind panic overtook her, and Padmé's knees gave way. She sank helplessly into a pool, and an instant later two robotic hands pushed her roughly to her feet and steered her forcefully away

"Anakin!" she yelled desperately into the rain. Kayle laughed heartlessly.

Her soft footsteps were drowned in a noise of metallic feet and pouring rain, and streams of water washed away all traces of the crime.

"_Anakin, help me!"_

But she wasn't heard.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Dayla was sitting on the armchair by the window, and Anakin was pacing back and forth in the room, talking to Obi-Wan per comlink. Through the Force, she perceived frustration and anger radiating from him, and she could associate with him. The woman he loved above all was gone, and he blamed himself for her disappearance.

"What do you mean by patience?" Anakin yelled into the comlink. "Padmé ran away, and she might be in danger!"

A crackling sound came from the gadget. Anakin listened to it, fuming. From the look of it, he didn't like the direction the conversation was going at all.

"Yes, Master," Anakin said with a badly hidden annoyance. He switched his comlink off and tossed it at the wall. It broke.

"Did it help?" Dayla asked quietly. Anakin was bursting, but she could barely move.

"No," Anakin said shortly. "Be wary of your emotions, Anakin," he mimicked Obi-Wan. If the situation wasn't so serious, and she so numb, Dayla would have laughed.

Anakin sighed wearily, and ran his hands through his golden hair, dishevelling it even more. "Obi-Wan will join us any moment, and we're supposed to wait for him," he said in his normal voice. He walked to the window and looked at the traffic outside. The streets were jammed as usual. "Obi-Wan hates flying," Anakin mumbled. "It will take ages till he arrives. And Padmé is in danger, I sense it."

Dayla jerked her head. "Danger?" she asked, bewildered.

Anakin stood by the window. "She had been kidnapped by Taren Meeda," he said through gritted teeth. He turned away from the window and faced Dayla. He was deadly pale, and he was shaking. "She is scared, and she's in pain."

"How do you know it?" Dayla asked him, baffled.

"I can feel it. I always feel it if she's afraid, or in peril. I always feel it if she thinks about me while I'm away." His voice trailed off, and he turned back to observing the traffic.

"I'll die if something happens to her. I can't live without her," he whispered. A single tear slid down his cheek.

Dayla felt again as if she were going to be sick. Anakin loved Padmé so much…The Nubian Senator had something that she could never have.

"I'll be outside," she murmured and rushed out of the room before Anakin had had the chance to stop her.

Her feet carried her to the streets, and she walked under the pouring rain, unaware of her surroundings. She was soaked to her skin and cold, but Dayla didn't take notice of any of it. She didn't care that she was supposed to wait for Master Kenobi. She needed to be alone, to be let wail in her misery.

Anakin and Padmé were bonded for eternity by marriage and their love for each other. Padmé was his wife, a second part of his soul. And who was she? Just a fellow Padawan, a symbol of belonging to the Order. She was just another Jedi, and in his heart, Anakin never belonged with the Jedi. His spirit was too free to be bound by the many rules.

She wasn't part of his life, and she never had been.

Rain drops kept falling on her face like rivers of tears, and Dayla stumbled blindly at the streets. How could she have been so naïve and believe that Anakin returned her feelings? He had made it perfectly clear…

_Her eyelids were heavy, and a tickling warmth spread over her body. Her eyes fluttered open, and an untidy room with droid parts all over the place drifted into her sight range. These were not her quarters. Where was she? Then memories of past hours flooded into her mind. _

_Anakin kissing her…The feeling of his silky skin under her hands….His hot breath on her neck…The feeling of happiness and completion she had never experienced before…_

_Anakin. She gasped and turned around, but the place near her was empty and cold. He must have gotten up long ago. A lump formed in her throat, and her eyes started burning again, as bitter feeling of disappointment clawed its way into her heart. What did she expect? That after a night they spent together Anakin would declare his love for her? But thinking rationally didn't make her feel any better. In fact, the feeling of disappointment only intensified._

"_You're awake," a quiet voice said from behind her. It belonged to Anakin. Dayla's heart made a mad flip and she turned around. _

_Anakin was sitting on the edge of the bed. He was fully clothed, and it looked like he had gotten up hours ago._

"_How long have you been awake?" she asked him, her voice still drowsy._

"_I got up as soon as you fell asleep," he said softly. His eyes reflected immeasurable sadness and guilt. _

_He looked away, biting his lip. "This night should never repeat again," he said after several seconds._

_Dayla's heart sank. "Why? Didn't…Didn't you like it?" she asked shyly, her voice sounding very childish. The words slipped from her tongue before she could stop herself. _

"_No, it's not that," Anakin said hastily. He looked at her, and Dayla felt herself melting under the stare of his brilliant blue eyes again, for what it felt for the thousandth time. "It was wrong of me to do it to you."_

"_But it was the best night of my life," she whispered brokenly. _

"_Exactly," he said quietly. "I've played with your feelings, and I will never forgive myself for it. You're one of the most treasured things in my life, and I've hurt you."_

"_No, Ani," Dayla protested hot-heartedly. "Tonight, you've made me the happiest woman in the universe." _

_Anakin smiled slightly. It was a sad smile, full of bitterness and pain. "It was a lie," he said shortly. "And I betrayed the woman I love."_

_Dayla stared at him, baffled. "What do you mean?"_

_Anakin pursed his lips and then faced her with a resolved look written on his features. "I can never love you the way you desire me to, Dayla. My heart belongs to another woman, and I will love her as long as I breathe. Tonight, I betrayed the trust of my best friend and the memory of the woman I love."_

"_But you don't have any commitment to her," Dayla said, still at loss. "You didn't betray her."_

_Anakin shook his head, his eyes growing even sadder than before. "I'm hers and I will always be only hers even if I never see her again. I was unfaithful to her both in body and soul, and it was wrong of me."_

_A strained silence overtook the room. Anakin stared into the space, and Dayla did her best to fight her tears, but they stubbornly persisted to leave her eyes. After what seemed eternity, Anakin broke the silence, and his words were a stab into her heart._

"_We shouldn't see each other for a while. It's for our mutual best."_

_The room began swimming, and Dayla squashed the sheets. "No," she managed to choke out. She felt so void._

_Anakin moved to her and squeezed her hand. "I'm sorry," he said sincerely, brushing a single tear from her cheek with his thumb. "I'm so sorry."_

_She caught his hands and kissed them hotly. "Don't…Please, don't-"she mumbled weakly, but her voice trailed away._

_Anakin covered her hands with his. He stroked her cheek very gently, as if afraid she would shatter from his touch. "I love you, Dayla," he said softly, his intense eyes burning a hole in her soul. "And I always will, no matter what happens."_

_Silent tears were storming in rivers down her cheeks as she had long given up fighting them. It seemed to her as if she wasn't even in this room, that this all happened to another person._

"_I love you, Anakin," she whispered in a barely audible voice. "I love you so much-"_

_Anakin closed his eyes and drew a deep breath. "I know," he said quietly. He kissed her forehead, and gave her hand a last squeeze before standing up._

_He walked to the door, and pushed the button. The door slid open. He cast her a last glance, his eyes haunted with guilt and shining with deep affection at the same time. _

"_Farewell," he said shortly, and then he was gone. _

_The door hissed behind him, and Dayla was left alone in the room, on his bed, tears flowing freely down her cheeks, but no amount of tears would be able to measure the pain she experienced. Her heart was broken, and the light of her universe died off here, in the quarters of the man she would love forever. _

Five years ago Anakin told her that he didn't love her. How could she have been so foolish? He had loved Padmé already then, years before they had met…

The rain was splattering even more madly, and the coldness grew so that her teeth started clattering. But her mind didn't perceive any of this.

Suddenly a sharp sense of fear and despair that was not her own stabbed her. She was standing in the dark alley, and the Dark Side of the Force was particularly strong there. Glimpses of emotions flashed in her mind. Guilt, fear, despair, love… A woman had been kidnapped, and Dayla knew who this woman was.

_Padmé has been kidnapped_.

A thought hit Dayla, and she sank onto the ground as her knees gave way. What if she stopped Anakin from saving her? Then Padmé would be gone from Anakin's life, and she might have had a chance with him. He would be heartbroken from the death of his wife, and she, his best friend, would comfort him, being at his side day and night. Anakin would depend on her help and would grow even closer than in their Padawan time. One day, Anakin's eyes may snap open and he would realise that he had loved her all along, from the beginning, and his love to Padmé had never been real…

Images of Anakin confessing his love to her were born in her mind, and a glowing flame ignited in her heart. Of course, Anakin would still grieve over Padmé, but his love for Dayla would make him whole again. She would carry his children, and he would take one of them as Padawan. A vision of a blonde-haired boy with bright blue eyes flashed before her eyes, and Dayla knew it to be Anakin's son. Maybe, one day Anakin would even marry her?

The rain didn't seem so cold anymore, and water splashed merrily under her knees. All she had to do was to find Padmé and ensure that Anakin would never locate her.

_It would be murder. Are you capable of taking a life of an innocent person?_

Dayla gave out a sob and slumped into the pool. That would be a murder…And she could never kill anyone, not even her rival. Besides, she felt bonded to Padmé – both of them were in love with one man so much it nearly drew them into insanity. If she killed Padmé, would Anakin ever be able to love her, a person who had taken life from the woman he loved?

A memory of Anakin standing by the window, waiting for Obi-Wan, exploded in her mind, and she felt sick again. _I can't live without her_, he had told Dayla. He had looked so devastated and desperate... A stab of endless shame pierced her, and she couldn't suppress a savage cry. How could she have ever thought about hurting Padmé on purpose? She was a Jedi, and the duty of the Jedi was to protect the helpless and shut down the emotions.

But the Code didn't matter to her at that moment. All that mattered was that she would hurt Anakin and commit a crime he would never forgive her. She didn't know if she could forgive herself either. Anakin's haunted blue eyes swam into her mind again, and her heart constricted in pain. She could never, ever hurt him. She cared about his feelings more than about her own.

A peal of thunder rocketed from far away. Very slowly, Dayla got up and, reaching into the Force, traced Padmé's location.

As she walked under the rain, she realised that all her dreams of Anakin returning her feelings were just an illusion of a lovesick girl. His heart was beating only for Padmé, and Dayla would never, ever replace her. She had no place in Anakin's life, and thus she had no place in the world. Life without him was empty and colourless, and not worth living at all.

------

A yellow speeder was rushing through the splashing rain, narrowly avoiding the collision with other machines and breaking at least a dozen traffic rules. Obi-Wan Kenobi sat on the by-passenger sit, and Anakin Skywalker was driving.

"How come that Taren escaped the prison?" Anakin barked loudly, throwing the machine in a sharp vertical dive. A violet speeder beeped at them, and Anakin pulled rigidly on the left.

"I don't know," Obi-Wan panted, trying to find his voice after another stunt. "The guards didn't notice anything."

Anakin growled and headed for the planet surface with a breathtaking speed. To Obi-Wan, he resembled a dark rain cloud sending bolts of lightning, but glowing with love at the same time. And Kenobi also sensed desperation and … guilt radiating in waves from his friend. Obi-Wan sighed. As it looked, Taren Meeda had kidnapped Padmé, and the Nubian Senator has always been a weak spot for his former Padawan.

"W-w-where is Dayla?" Obi-Wan yelled, clutching at his seat for the dear life. If the situation wasn't so serious, Anakin would have to endure a long, boring lecture about showing disrespect to his former Master for pulling such stunts.

"She is not capable of any fighting at the moment," Anakin said quietly.

A silence stretched between them. Obi-Wan pondered silently over the extent of Anakin and Dayla's relationship. On many occasions, he had spotted her giving Anakin the same look of longing he had given Siri. The two of them had been very close friends as Padawans, but the death of their two mutual friends drove them apart instead of strengthening the bond. Something must have happened between Anakin and Dayla, and now the old secret resurfaced again. Obi-Wan wondered how many secrets Anakin was hiding from him.

"Do you know where we are heading to?"

Instead of answering, Anakin pulled the speeder up so spontaneously that Obi-Wan had to suppress the urge to vomit.

"Padmé is in danger," Anakin replied shortly, his eyes glassy. "I can sense her."

Obi-Wan decided that it was safer for him not to ask how his brother was able to locate the Senator he had officially been seeing only once or twice a year. They were flying through the Coruscanti streets with a speed of a rocket, and Obi-Wan could only hope that they would make it. He also hoped that Anakin would be able to control his emotions.

-------

A twister of anguish and desperation hurtled over the shabby, worn building in one of the most horrible streets of the Coruscanti underworld. Dayla ignited her lightsaber and, calling upon the Force, stepped cautiously inside. A sweetish, rotten smell washed over her, and she had gotten a feeling as if she walked into the realm of death.

Through the Force, Dayla perceived a sudden movement on her left, and, turning round, she found her being cornered by several battle droids. Absolute silence was disturbed only by the sound of pulled triggers and the humming lightsaber.

"Jedi, surrender," said one of them, his mechanical voice booming oddly in the hall.

"No, thank you," Dayla said emotionlessly, feigning a smile.

Without warning, she launched herself at them. The voice of reason ordered her to stop, it told her that she was not strong enough to take them all, but she didn't care. Anakin's transparent image floated before her inner eye, as she swirled her weapon in every direction. She didn't know what she was fighting – were it the droids, or was she trying to vanquish the numbness within her?

With a loud clang, the last droid fell onto the ground. Dayla deactivated her blade and walked up the screeching stairs. She reached a durasteel door, and opened it, calling on the Force. Dayla wandered into a large, dimly-lit hall. The stench of death and derelidiction was particularly strong here.

A man was standing in the middle, his scarlet lightsaber humming menacingly in the eerie quietness. Dayla couldn't help but gasp at his striking resemblance with Anakin. He was tall, with dark blonde hair and blue eyes. Only his eyes were icy cold and deserted, and waked a feeling of dread in her. The Force was very strong with him, but he was enveloped in an impenetrable black cloud that devoured all the light – the complete opposite to Anakin's glowing Force presence. Dayla understood immediately who this man was. Taren Meeda, one of the most dangerous and twisted Dark Jedi.

"Taren Meeda, you are under arrest," Dayla said calmly. She had no fear or disgust towards this man. In fact, she felt nothing at all, only cold, dead numbness that seemed to consume her entire life energy.

Taren sneered. "Say please," he said mockingly. He took a step towards her, and the sound of metal hitting the beton erupted in the hall.

"Where is Senator Amidala?"

"Oh, she is safe, for the time being. Once her husband rushes in, things may change," he said maliciously, an aura of cold triumph around him.

Dayla ignited her weapon. "Don't make me hurt you," she said evenly. She knew that she didn't stand a chance against him, but fear had long abandoned her. What did she have to be afraid of? Death? Death was only a part of a life circle. But rotting in loneliness, neither dead nor truly alive, seeing Anakin living happily with another woman – it was a fate she couldn't bear to live.

Taren moved to her. He had no flesh limbs…

"Admitting the work of your beloved?" he asked her, the tone of his voice mock gentle.

"You got what you deserved," Dayla spat through gritted teeth. She swung her blade and aimed for the Dark Jedi's ribs, but her strike was effortlessly blocked.

"By the way, where is Skywalker?" Taren asked casually, kicking her hard into the stomach. Dayla staggered backwards.

"He is on his way," she said evenly, resuming the fight and parrying a blow.

"Why isn't he here to back you up?" Taren asked with mock curiosity. Their blades clashed, and they held steady, gazing at each other. Taren laughed in cold delight.

"It seems that Skywalker doesn't care if you are alive or dead. He doesn't need you, and he never did."

Dayla blinked, and, seizing a moment, Taren hit her roughly on the jaw. She fell under the force of the blow, and her cheek swelled immediately. Dayla admitted reluctantly that his metallic fist was very strong. She stood up and attacked again.

"You ache for him, don't you?" Taren asked, passing a savage blow that missed her shoulder by inches. "I can feel your little heart longing for him, your feeble Force signature radiating with mad love. It is disgusting."

"You could never understand it," Dayla said quietly. "You have never loved and you were never loved in return."

_Neither was I_.

Her lightsaber arm trembled, and Taren sliced right through it. With a sickening thud, an arm still gripping the weapon, fell onto the floor. Dayla dropped on her knees, clutching a stump. Taren walked to her and held his blade across her chest.

"You are just a girl who doesn't want to live," he said emotionlessly.

For a fraction of second, Dayla believed to see his eyes flashing with pity, but then he raised his weapon, and she felt a hot, throbbing pain in her abdomen.

_Anakin!_ She cried silently, and then everything went black.

A/N: As always, the more reviews I get, the sooner I'll update! If you liked it, I'm really curious to know what you liked about it . If you didn't like it, I would appreciate it if you told me what I can improve about the chapter. :)

In theory, I should be getting at least twenty reviews per chapter, because many of you have put it on the alert or on the favourites list. I'm flattered that so many of you read it, and I'm truly grateful for it. :) Just...would it be so hard to drop a review? If you do the math, reading a chapter takes five to ten minutes, and writing a review maybe two or three. It's not that hard, is it::grins:

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: I'm terribly sorry it had taken me so long to update! I was on holidays, and I've just come back yesterday. I'll try my best to do personal replies in the next past days, but real life is acting a bit crazy at the moment after three weeks away…

Enjoy!

**Chapter Ten**

Anakin stopped the speeder in front of a derelict building in the deepest levels of Coruscant underworld. Not even smugglers and bounty hunters dared enter this region. The air smelled like death and despair. He climbed out of the machine into the splattering rain.

Suddenly, he felt dizzy, as if the air was drawn out of his lungs. A wave of anguish overwhelmed him, and he had to lean on the speeder to keep on his feet. The Force was mourning, and he could feel a bitterness of a broken heart through it. Then one of the lights he felt bonded with, tinkered and died off.

_Dayla_.

Without casting a glance at Obi-Wan, Anakin rushed to the building, praying that his childhood friend would still be alive. It would be his fault if she died…He couldn't lose yet another person he loved.

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan cried behind him, but rain and howling of the wind swallowed his words.

Anakin burst through the door and found himself standing in the gloomy hallway. The Dark Side of the Force was strong here, but it was the last thing Anakin cared about at the moment. Obi-Wan caught up with him and placed the hand on his shoulder.

"What happened, Anakin?" Obi-Wan asked him anxiously. "Is it Padmé?"

Anakin shook his head. "Padmé is alright. She is scared, but she isn't hurt. It is Dayla."

He started walking up the stairs, and Obi-Wan followed him. "Dayla?" he asked in confusion.

"She must have gone to find Taren," Anakin said heavily. As he thought about the Dark Jedi again, he felt himself filling up with anger, and adrenaline surged through him. He gripped the hilt of his lightsaber tightly, and it screeched under the strength of his hold. Taren had hurt Padmé and killed Dayla… Anakin would make sure that he paid for his crimes.

They halted before a large door, made out of durasteel. Anakin summoned the Force, feeding from his anger. He felt himself shaking.

"We should get inside very cautious-"Obi-Wan started, but his words were drowned in a deafening sound of a fallen door, as Anakin gave it a powerful Force-push. The elder Jedi sighed wearily and shook his head in a gesture of exasperation.

Dust clouds obscured the vision, and Anakin stepped inside. The hall was empty with the exception of a limp body lying motionlessly on the floor. His heart constricted and something icy seemed to crawl into his stomach, making his head spin. He recognised the young woman.

"What-"Obi-Wan started speaking again, but his voice trailed away as he stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of the sprawled body.

Feeling a fit of despair coming up, Anakin rushed to his old friend. He remembered the first time when he had talked to her in the Room of Thousand Fountains. He had felt so lonely and detached at that moment, and Obi-Wan had been so formal to him…He remembered the look of compassion on her plump face, her lively grey eyes sparkling with curiosity. He remembered how comfortable he had felt beside the girl he barely knew. He remembered how elated he had been in his quarters later that day – he had finally found a friend.

All this rushed through his mind in the few seconds it took him to be by her side. He fell on his knees beside her, and squeezed her left hand. Her face, usually cheerful and rosy, was blank and pale. Anakin brushed her cheek. It was still warm. Dayla had long grown into a young attractive woman from the plump curious girl, and he had long ceased to be a tiny boy from Tatooine, but she would always be the embodiment of his childhood at the Temple. And he loved her for that.

"Dayla," he called desperately, stroking her hair. Through his Force vision, he could see the once bright light tinkering feebly, and he let out a sigh of relief. She was still alive…

Her abdomen was pierced by a lightsaber, and there was nothing he could do to heal the wound. His fingers lingered at her right arm, which ended with a stump. Taren had cut off her arm. Grief mixed with ever increasing anger, and Anakin nearly choked on his emotions.

"Dayla, do you hear me?" he called softly. "It's Anakin."

He brushed a bundle of red hair from her forehead. She was so pale…"Please, answer to me. Please-"

His voice broke off, and a lump formed in his throat. His eyes started to burn, but no tears welled up in them. He continued to stare at her, stroking her head, pleading for her to wake up, but she continued to lie still. Obi-Wan stood beside him, and Anakin was grateful for his former Master's support, though he could not speak yet.

Her eyelids trembled, and her eyes fluttered open. "Anakin," she whispered.

Anakin smiled. "You are alive," he said relieved, running his fingers through her hair. He preferred to omit the fact that she was mortally injured. "Everything will be alright. We will transport you to the Temple, the medics will patch you up, and in a few days you will be on your feet. We will go to the mission together, and there you will help me drive Obi-Wan crazy."

Dayla's lips stretched into a feeble smile. "You could never lie to me, Ani," she said weakly. Her breathing was heavy and ragged. "Don't start now."

Anakin's eyes burned with unshed tears. "I knew that you had a crush on Obi-Wan," he managed to choke out. "But you can annoy me instead. You were always good at it."

Dayla tried to laugh, but she wasn't strong enough. "You were always good at driving all of us crazy. You should have seen Darriss after some of your debates. He was close to adding holes to the Temple walls. And it's _Darriss_ I'm talking about-"

Her voice grew weaker with each word. She gasped desperately for air, the sound of it like a funeral march to Anakin's ears. She opened her mouth to say something else, but Anakin silenced her.

"You should spare your strength," he said gently. "You must live on. Please."

Dayla made a poor attempt at smile. "What for?" she asked him, and he was surprised at the hollowness of her voice. "What is worth living for, when the only thing I want to have is out of my reach?"

Anakin didn't know what to say. The sickening feeling in his stomach intensified. Dayla's breathing grew even more ragged, and Anakin could feel her light trailing away.

"I'm so sorry," he said after several moments. He felt as if he would break from the terrible grief.

Dayla's dispersed gaze focused on him. "Don't be sorry," she whispered in a barely audible voice. "You have given me what I always dreamt of. It doesn't matter that it was only a lie for you."

Her glance became unfocused again, and Anakin wasn't sure if she still saw him.

"I love you," he said sincerely, brushing her cheek.

"No, you don't," Dayla whispered, her voice hoarse. "Not the way I love you. But thanks for saying it-"

Her voice died off, and she drew one last, horribly ragged breath before passing away. Her head fell limply, and her grey eyes, always so full of life, turned glassy.

"Dayla," Anakin called, shaking the still body, even though he knew that she was gone. His mind refused to believe in it. "Dayla, hear me!"

"Anakin," Obi-Wan said, his voice filled with endless sadness. "She is-"

"Dead?" another voice finished for him.

The sound of mechanical legs filled the room, and several droids and Taren appeared seemingly out of nowhere. Anakin closed Dayla's eyes and stood up, his own eyes glistering with imaginative tears.

"It was a heart-wrenching scene to witness," Taren sneered venomously. "I even had tears in my eyes when the poor, desperate girl died."

Anakin felt grief being replaced by mad rage. This man killed Dayla, and he had hurt Padmé. Anger overtook him, and he felt his barriers crumpling under the surge of savage power. Air crackled around them, as if sparkled with electricity. Without clearly thinking what he was doing, Anakin extended his hand, and under the power of his Force-push, all droids were sent flying into the air with a breathtaking speed. Not a single one remained undamaged. Taren, however, remained standing, and he was unimpressed by Anakin's demonstration.

"Another best friend died at your fault and in front your eyes. Who is your best friend now?"

"Master, please, find Padmé," Anakin said evenly, activating his lightsaber. "I want to finish him on my own."

"Anakin, revenge is not the Jedi way," Obi-Wan said apprehensively.

"I don't care," Anakin growled in a low voice that was so different from his own. "This monster hurt Padmé and killed my best friend. You can't stop me, Master. Not now."

Obi-Wan looked hesitant, but then nodded reluctantly. "Please, control your emotions, Anakin," he said before rushing off.

Taking a calming breath, Anakin enveloped himself in the Force and leaped at Taren. Once again, they became engaged in a cage of blue and red, moving with an inhuman speed and precision.

"You have a lovely and passionate wife, Anakin," Taren said, smirking gleefully. "If you hadn't come in the last time, she would have given herself to me wholly. But today, we caught up where we broke off."

Anakin felt the thin walls of his self-restriction crumple, and the Force ocean shuddered violently. A tsunami of black, destructive power washed over him, and puffs of red smoke danced before his eyes. Since his mother had died, Anakin had carried a beast in his chest, and he feared the power it had over him. He feared what he would be capable of if he lessened the shields around it. But in this situation, he only welcomed its untamed power.

Feeling the monster breaking free, Anakin attacked Taren with such speed that his vision became blurry. He didn't see his opponent; he didn't perceive his surrounding and the cold blue light of his blade was the only thing his physical vision captured. Through the Force, Anakin felt fear taking hold over Taren, how his feeble Force reserves were slowly fading away. A smirk touched his handsome featured, a taste of invincibility and vengeance in his mouth. The Dark Jedi was nothing but a miserable little creature that could be squashed easily.

Anakin felt the Force quivering, its beautiful white glow tarnished by blackness, but Anakin thought that he had never seen anything as magnificent as this thick darkness. It sang to him, inviting him to submerge in it, and the monster in him echoed to it, telling him to accept its calling. Why did he call the creature in him a monster? It was a joyful bundle of energy, full of good intentions. He touched it, and the creature purred in delight, telling him to kill Taren.

Anakin kicked Taren hard in the solar plexus, the Force strengthening his kick, and the Dark Jedi fell backwards. The crimson blade slashed the air, intent on cutting his flesh arm off, but Anakin blocked it. Taren was evil and twisted, for he wanted to hurt Padmé. He was a vessel of darkness, and therefore needed to be eliminated. Taren killed Dayla, and Anakin loved her. Taren forced Padmé into betraying him, and Anakin hated him for that.

A tremble spread over the sea of darkness, and Anakin threw Taren across the wall. The Dark Jedi fell hard onto the floor, but stood up at once only to be hit by a section of the wall that Anakin tossed at him. It buried him beneath it, and Taren lay panting, his face badly bruised and bleeding.

Anakin walked to him, his entire being screaming in gloating delight, the creature praising him. He extended his hand, and the still activated crimson lightsaber flew into his outstretched hand. He deactivated it.

"And so it ends for you, Taren Meeda," Anakin said calmly.

The injured man coughed bitterly. "No, it ends for you here," he said quietly. "It's not me you have defeated, you have defeated yourself."

The beast laughed loudly, and Anakin laughed with it. "I'm the Chosen One. I cannot be defeated."

Anakin thought that Taren's eyes flashed with pity, but the beast told him that it was a sparkle of malice.

"I despise you, Anakin Skywalker," Taren said quietly. "But the person I'm talking with now is not him. Skywalker is the Chosen One, and his destiny will always keep him away from his friends. You, too, will always walk a lonely path, but only because no one will ever love you. They will hate and fear you, and in your bitterness, you will kill them one by one only to make yourself more hated, more repulsive in their eyes. It's a chain reaction – the darkness will swallow you until there is nothing more left of your former self." His voice softened, and Anakin could have sworn that sadness mirrored in his eyes. The beast told him to ignore it, and he obeyed. "I know what it feels like."

Anakin lowered his blue blade to Taren's neck. "I'm not alone," he said coldly. "I have friends who care about me, and a wife who loves me."

"But your wife betrayed you, and she will do it again," Taren said simply. Red blood was flowing out of his mouth.

Red. Red as the puffs of smoke that danced even more madly before Anakin's eyes.

Padmé wouldn't betray him again. It wasn't a betrayal in the first place.

"You lie," Anakin growled menacingly, his fist clenching.

Taren smirked. "A dying man never lies," he said, his feeble voice colouring in a venomous tone. "I didn't even have to mind-trick her. I wouldn't even be able even if I needed to; she is too strong-minded. She kissed me wholly aware that it wasn't you who she was kissing."

Anakin drew a shaky, unstable breath. "Liar," he said in a trembling voice.

He extended his right hand, his entire being screaming in savage lust to kill Taren, and the Dark Jedi gasped for air, clutching his throat. Anakin increased his hold on him, and Taren's face slowly turned pale. Anakin smirked inwardly, feeling the surge of power flowing through his body. It felt good.

"Anakin!" he heard a voice calling him from far, far away. He knew this voice.

He released his grip on Taren and looked round. Obi-Wan came in, supporting Padmé. She was bruised and looked the worse for wear, but her eyes were glowing like bright stars in the infinite blackness of the space, and love radiating from her was so overpowering that his breath was taken away. The beast told him to ignore her, because she was a traitor, but Anakin didn't listen to it.

"Anakin!" she cried again. Tears were running down her cheeks, but she was smiling. Despite her bruises and several cuts, Anakin had never seen a more beautiful thing before.

The beast cried violently to turn his back on her and kill Taren, but its pleas had fallen on deaf ears. Why was he listening to it, anyway? The thing he was about to do was a murder, and Anakin was not a killer. Taren was a helpless, defeated enemy, and he would die from his injuries anyway. Slowly, Anakin felt the darkness rushing away from him, the light sparkling again, but the beast demanded to be released again. Padmé could never love a beast. As unconditional love to his wife overtook his heart, he could feel the beast screaming in agony and retreating in the deepest recesses of his soul. It was not likely to resurface again, and Anakin would make sure it never would.

"Padmé," he gasped, grinning from ear to ear. "Are you hurt?"

She shook her head, and suddenly burst in tears. Anakin wanted to rush to her, to take her in his arms, to tell her that he loved her, but a hand gripped his ankle. He looked down, and saw Taren staring at him in astonishment.

"She is a traitor," he hissed. "Why do you love her? She betrayed you, and she would do it again in a blink of an eye."

Anakin jerked his leg from his touch. "I don't think of it as of betrayal," he said calmly, and at this moment, he believed in his own words. "She loves me, and you can never betray someone you love."

Taren bit his lip, looking sad. "You are a young, compassionate fool, Anakin Skywalker. Time will prove you wrong."

Even if Padmé was waiting for him, Anakin couldn't help but linger for another moment next to the man he nearly killed in cold blood. "You were a Jedi once, Taren Meeda," he said quietly, lowering himself next to him. "What happened to you that you chose a path of darkness?"

Taren chuckled bitterly. "Path of darkness," he said maliciously. "These are great words, as if by the Jedi textbook. The Jedi deal in absolutes. They don't see that evil is never a pure evil. They don't realise what real power is. If they opened their eyes and used it, the galaxy would have been a much better place. But they are too blind. The galaxy is changing, but the Jedi just sit in the Council chamber, meditating about the ways of the Force-"

His voice broke off, caught in a fit of coughing, blood spluttering from his mouth. "You see it too, Anakin Skywalker," he continued, locking his eyes with Anakin's, and the younger Jedi didn't look away. "You aren't content with the ways of the Order either, I can see it in your eyes. You and I, we are unique, and that's why we will always be alone."

"I'm not like you," Anakin spat, disgusted. "I am a Jedi, and serve to the light. And I'm not alone. I have a wife who loves me, and two friends who care about me."

Taren snorted. "I have already told you not to trust your wife," he said quietly. "As for your friends, they are not your real friends."

"What?" Anakin exclaimed, abashed.

"Palpatine is first and foremost a politician, and he is interested in the benefits of the Republic only. As for Obi-Wan, he is only loyal to the principles. He never wanted you in the first place, and if you step over the line, he will sacrifice you for the greater good in the blink of an eye. He will do nothing to try and save you."

It was enough. "Obi-Wan trained and cared about me since I was a little boy," Anakin contradicted, standing up. "And Palpatine has my best interests in his heart."

Taren stared at him long and unblinking, and Anakin couldn't make himself look away. "One of them is only pretending to be your friend," he said quietly, his voice surprisingly soft. "I hate you, Anakin Skywalker, but I see much of myself in you. You hear the same voice calling for you, and that's why I feel bonded to you and tell you this. One of them is not your friend. He is only using you for his plans, and you are a pawn in his hands."

Anakin looked at him incredulously. It was impossible! He would trust both Obi-Wan and Palpatine with his life. "You lie," he said shortly, and walked away from him.

He heard a sound of feeble, bitter laugh behind him. "Time will show you that I was right, young fool."

Ignoring Taren, he rushed to Padmé and embraced her gently. "Did he hurt you?" Anakin asked her anxiously, holding a breath.

"No," she whispered, smiling happily. "He didn't have a chance to."

Anakin exhaled loudly, and took her in his arms again. _Padmé hadn't been hurt_, he thought, his heart making a back flip.

"Ani, I was so scared," Padmé murmured into his chest. "I was so scared that you wouldn't come. I was so scared that you didn't love me…"

His heart breaking from her words and from his stupidity, Anakin gently pulled away from Padmé. "I'm so sorry, my love," he said sincerely. "I've been stupid."

Padmé shook her head. "No, I've been stu-" she started contradicting him, but he silenced her with a hot, passionate kiss. Anakin sensed Obi-Wan turning away, and even if he knew that they had a lot to discuss, he didn't want to think about it at this moment. The only thing that was important was that he was kissing his wife, the thing he had been aching to do for many months.

"I should bring you to the medical ward," he said after they broke off.

Padmé nodded. "I'm sorry about Dayla," she said softly, looking at the still body. "I know she meant much to you."

Anakin wanted to thank her, but words failed him. The pain of loss was still too fresh, and the happiness at their reunion too vivid. Conflicting emotions took hold of him again, and he could only smile slightly at her words. Padmé returned his smile, her eyes shining with love and understanding.

"Obi-Wan?" Anakin called to his former Master, who was still standing rigidly, with his back turned.

"Can I turn around?" Obi-Wan asked, the tone of his voice too casual.

"Yes, you can look now," Anakin said, grinning from ear to ear despite himself.

Obi-Wan turned around, looking slightly embarrassed and flushed. Anakin decided that he would tease him about it later.

"I need to escort Senator Amidala to the medical ward," he said evenly. "Could you please guard Taren till the shuttle arrives?"

Obi-Wan nodded. "Of course," he said calmly. "And meanwhile you can look after _Senator Amidala_."

Padmé laughed, and Anakin had to resist the urge to kiss her again in front of Obi-Wan again, but then decided not to test his Master's patience. As he looked round, his glance fell on Dayla.

"She deserves a funeral," he said quietly. "Please make sure that she will be taken care of."

Obi-Wan gave him a long look full of compassion. "She will be," he said at last.

With a last glance at his old friend's body, Anakin gripped Padmé by the waist and escorted her to the exit, away from this horrible place where he had nearly lost himself.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: **As always, thanks a billion for reading and _reviewing_! Only epilogue left after this chapter.

Enjoy!

**Chapter Eleven**

Anakin stood at the head of the stony table in the Hall of Remembrance, saying his last goodbye to his best friend, Dayla Telwis. The ceremony was long over, and now the Jedi were leaving the room. Some had looks of acceptance, while the other faces reflected sadness.

Tongues of flame were eating her body, turning her into ashes. Never again would he see her cheerful grey eyes watching him amusingly, never again would he laugh with her, never again would he comfort her or be comforted by her… She now existed only in intangible memories and holograms.

As he stood by the funeral pyre, the fire reflecting in his eyes, Anakin saw clearly how all people who loved him left his side one by one – Qui-Gon Jinn, his mom, Tak and Darriss, and now Dayla. Was it indeed his fate, to walk through life alone, causing death to everyone he held dear?

Anakin watched Dayla's vivid red hair charring and turning to ashes along with the rest of her body. A young woman, who had unconditionally loved him, was now gone from this universe, and black ashes were the only thing that remained of her.

Black ashes…it would be the only thing that would remain of him, and looking at the black sand, no one would ever think of a young boy with bright blue eyes, who wanted to see all the stars and who fell in love with an angel. His immeasurable love for Padmé would die with his last breath, and only black ashes would be left behind.

Nothing more.

-----

Obi-Wan Kenobi sat by the brink of a fountain in the Temple, listening to the merry splashing of the water. It sparkled joyfully in all colours of a rainbow, and just by simply gazing at it, the Jedi Master felt a warm comfort spreading over him, soothing the turmoil of his soul. How many secrets was Anakin hiding from him? Why couldn't he trust him?

Quiet footsteps approached him, and in a rustling of fabric, a figure clad in a black cloak lowered itself next to him. Obi-Wan caught a glimpse of the infamous dishevelled blonde head, and the glowing white Force signature told him that it was Anakin. Both of them sat in silence, simply enjoying each other's presence.

"Master, there is something you should know," Anakin began hesitantly after a moment.

"What is going on between you and Padmé?" Obi-Wan asked quietly, continuing his contemplation of the sparkling water. He had been sure that Anakin had been in love with Padmé, and the Senator's actions from yesterday confirmed his suspicions. But how far were the two of them involved?

Anakin took a moment before responding. "She is my wife," he said exactly as softly as Obi-Wan had. "We have been married since Geonosis."

Obi-Wan felt his jaw drop, as he took a calming breath. Married…Anakin was married. Obi-Wan knew that Anakin's and Padmé's relationship was much more than a mere infatuation, but marriage? It was an outrageous break of the Code, and by giving to his emotions and forming such an attachment, his former Padawan had betrayed all the entire Order stood for.

White circles danced before his eyes, and Obi-Wan covered his face with his hands, trying to get rid of the circles, but they kept coming, taunting him. Anakin had been lying to him for three years. Did he value their bond so little, did he put so little faith in his Master's friendship? Did he think that Obi-Wan would report him to the Council? The Jedi Master felt dizziness catching up with him, and the next moment, a warm hand touched his shoulder.

"Master, are you alright?" Anakin spike tentatively.

Obi-Wan gave an indistinct sound out. The shock was slowly wearing out, and the feeling of happiness for his brother replaced it. Anakin had never been an ordinary Jedi, and he could never follow the strict rules of the Jedi Order. And the more Obi-Wan thought about the Code, the less he cared about the fact that his former Padawan had broken it. Padmé made Anakin happy, and she brought some much-needed peace to him. All that mattered to Obi-Wan was that Anakin would find happiness in the arms of the Nubian Senator, and his friend's happiness meant to him more than anything in the world.

"I'm just disappointed, Anakin," Obi-Wan said kindly. He looked at his friend, and the young man hung his head in shame. "You should have told me."

Anakin bit his lip. "I was afraid that you would report me to the Council," he confessed. "But I was wrong." He raised his head and peered Obi-Wan into the eyes. "I'm sorry, Obi-Wan. I'm sorry for not trusting you as I should have."

Obi-Wan smiled slightly. "You don't need to apologise, Anakin," he said sincerely. "I was just taken aback, that's all."

Anakin lowered his eyes once more. "I'm responsible for Dayla's death," he whispered. "If it wasn't for me, she would still be alive."

Obi-Wan frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Five years ago, right after Tak's and Darriss's death, I made a horrible mistake," Anakin said, his voice filled with immeasurable grief and shame. "I didn't mean to do it, but I…played with her feelings. We were intimate," he added in response to Obi-Wan's quizzical stare. "I put this night behind me, but she continued to dwell on it, waging hope that one day I would return her feelings. But I could never love her the way she loves me."

Obi-Wan put his hand on Anakin's shoulder. "It's not your fault," he said firmly. "Dayla chose this path, and you can't blame yourself for her choice. You can't save everyone, Anakin."

"But I should never have given her the illusion of hope," Anakin contradicted bitterly. "Years later, my mistake broke her heart, and I'm afraid that it also broke Padmé's."

"I don't deny the fact that it was wrong of you, not only because you've broken the Code," Obi-Wan retorted calmly. "But you aren't responsible for her weakness of spirit. She is a Jedi, and she shouldn't have been behaving the way she did."

Anakin sighed. "I know that," he admitted wearily. "In my mind, I know that she made her choice herself. But a part of me still can't come to terms with it, and another part of me hates her for this spontaneous decision. Don't start with telling me to let go of hatred," Anakin added hastily, a shadow of grin forming in the corners of his mouth.

Obi-Wan chuckled reluctantly. "You will find your forgiveness in the Force," he said softly. If Anakin hadn't been feeling so low, he would have scolded him for forming yet another attachment, for his desire to keep everyone by his side. The universe didn't work this way, and Anakin failed to realize it yet. Obi-Wan hoped that his Padawan would comprehend the ways of the Living Force before it was too late.

Obi-Wan glanced sideways at Anakin, whose eyes didn't reflect the joyful game of the water's colours. They were full of grief and shame. And…there was so much depth to them that Obi-Wan couldn't help but explore them further. These eyes belonged to a man who had seen much of the world and not only the beautiful landscapes of such peaceful planets as Naboo. These eyes saw much pain, much death, and their owner had been through much suffering, far more than he should have been for his young age. Anakin was hardly older than a boy, but there wasn't anything boyish left in him. When, Obi-Wan wondered inwardly, did the little Ani from Tatooine grow into the young handsome man that was sitting next to him?

"Master," Anakin began shyly. "Taren said that you never cared for me, and that you would sacrifice me over the greater good without hesitation-"

"It's rubbish," Obi-Wan interrupted his Padawan more harshly than he intended to. "I love you, Anakin, and I always cared for you," he continued in a softer voice. "It doesn't matter that I had to promise my dying Master to train you. The Force wanted it to happen, and I'm grateful for it. And I would never hurt you."

Anakin just looked at him. "Thank you, Obi-Wan," he said quietly, but his eyes told the elder Jedi millions.

"Except," Obi-Wan said seriously, though he tried his best to hide a grin in his beard. "If you started slaughtering innocent banthas, I'm terribly sorry to tell you that I would have to defend them."

Anakin stared at him, abashed, and as Obi-Wan's words have sunk in, he burst into a loud laughter. Obi-Wan couldn't help but grin affectionately at his best friend and brother laughing cheerfully, the sound of his infectious laughter music to his ears. He cared about Anakin more than a former Master should have, and partly to his astonishment, Obi-Wan found himself not bothered by it at all. He had formed an attachment to Anakin, and if anything horrific happened, it would be harder for him to let go. But Obi-Wan didn't care about it. Watching Anakin laugh, he didn't believe that anything would happen that would make him regret about the attachment he had formed to the young man.

Because he and Anakin were more than brothers, and it would remain this way forever. Obi-Wan had never been surer about anything.

-------

It was already dark when Anakin entered the guesthouse Padmé had been allotted by the Senate. So much had happened during the few days he had spent on Coruscant. So many tears were shed, and hearts were broken. The events of these days changed him, and they affected Padmé as well. But despite everything that happened, he still loved his wife, perhaps even more than before.

She was already sleeping when he came into her room. To his immense relief, Taren hadn't hurt her physically. His heart constricted every time he thought what horrors this monster could have unleashed on his angel. But was Taren such a soulless monster as he had thought him to be? Evil had many faces and colours, and Anakin had been sure that Taren wasn't lost completely. He had been a Jedi once… What could possibly make him betray everything he stood for and turn to the darkness?

Anakin entered the bedroom. Padmé was sleeping, her magnificent hair sprawled on her pillow. Her face still bore traces of bruises and some minor scratches, but otherwise she was unhurt. As he came closer to her, a light of a speeder whooshing by, lit her face. It was covered with a layer of perspiration, and bore an expression of utmost fear. She was being plagued by another nightmare…

Anakin lowered himself cautiously on the bed and gently shook her shoulder. "Padmé, wake up," he called her softly, sending calming waves of Force to her. Her ragged breathing normalised as he kept soothing her through the Force, and her beautiful brown eyes flattered open.

"Anakin," she whispered relieved, the corners of her mouth twitching into one of the smiles he loved so much. "You are here, alive…You haven't been claimed by darkness…"

"What do you mean, Padmé?" Anakin asked her quietly, stroking her hair.

Padmé inhaled shakily. She was trembling with fear, and Anakin scooped her in his arms, rocking her back and forth.

"I keep seeing the same dream again and again," she said weakly, clutching at his tunic. "You accuse me of betrayal, and then you say that I have broken your heart. And then…darkness suffocates you, and … I don't know what happens to you…"

Anakin kissed the top of her head and wrapped her into the Force glow, strengthening the soothing Force cocoon with golden threads of his love, unconditional and ever-growing. "I could never accuse you of betrayal, Padmé," he said gently. "I trust you more than anyone in this universe. And I'm not going to be taken by darkness, I promise you."

He had overcome the darkness within him when he had fought with Taren, and the beast was securely caged in his soul never to break free again. His love to Padmé would keep it at bay, and as long as his heart beat for her, the monster would never possess him again.

"But I betrayed you," Padmé mumbled into his tunic, sounding as though she were about to be choked by shame. "I have been unfaithful to you in my heart, and I have betrayed you by being furious with you for something you'd done years before we have met."

Anakin gently pushed her away and peered her into the eyes. He couldn't believe his ears, but as he gazed into her enormous brown orbs, he understood that he heard right. "You were an emotional mess at that time, Padmé," he contradicted firmly. "You were confused and dejected. I don't blame you for what happened between you and Taren."

"But I was ready to-" Padmé began, tears welling up in her eyes, but Anakin silenced her.

"A Jedi never thinks of what if's," he said, a fluent grin touching his youthful features. "It didn't happen, so stop blaming yourself. And I'm the one who should apologize to you."

Padmé shook her head. "No, Ani. You were a free man at that time, and you didn't owe me anything. Five years ago, I could have never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would one day marry little Ani from Tatooine."

Even if Padmé smiled encouragingly, Anakin still felt stabs of shame piercing his heart. He remembered Padmé's tear-stricken face and heart-wrenching cry of pain after he had broken the news to her. He remembered the deepest wells of despair that were Dayla's eyes in the morning after that fateful night… His momentary loss of control had such horrific consequences for all of them. Would he ever be able to make it right again?

"I should have told you about Dayla, Padmé," Anakin said earnestly. "You deserved to know about my past."

Padmé looked aside. "You said yourself that a Jedi never thinks of what ifs," she said, an unhappy smile brushing her features. She looked at him; her face an inscrutable mask to his eyes. "Ani, no matter how hard I try, I'll never be able to forget what happened between you and Dayla. But it happened, and it cannot be taken back."

She sighed. "All I know is that I still am madly in love with you, and this episode from your past doesn't make me love you less," Padmé added quietly, entwining the fingers of her hand with his mechanical hand.

Anakin glanced at her white fingers, looking so fragile and helpless between his black ones. Her pure hand entwined in his artificial hand that knew so much horror and destruction. Humanity and machinery…Innocence and the feeling of dirtiness… Padmé was the only anchor that held him at the Light Side, the only one who kept saving him all over again from darkness. Where would he be without her?

"Thank you," he whispered softly, feeling unable to say anything else. "I wouldn't want you to forget about it either."

Wordless, Padmé flung herself into his arms, and he rested his head on her shoulder. She was his best and only source of comfort. But would she stay by his side forever? What if something happened to her, and he wouldn't be able to save her? Or would he be the cause of her death, as it happened with his friends? Or … would she turn her back on him?

_I won't forget the episode with Taren either, Padmé. _

"I'll always be by your side, Ani," Padmé murmured softly, rubbing circles on his back. It was as if she were able to sense his deepest fears.

Anakin gently pulled away. "What?"

"I will follow you anywhere, Ani," Padmé said quietly but firmly, squeezing his hand. "I will follow you to the darkest path you take. I promise."

Anakin just looked at her, long and intensive, mesmerised by the depth of her brown orbs. "Never make promises you can't keep, Padmé."

She feigned a smile. "I will keep this one."

After several long moments, Anakin smiled, feeling yet again too stirred to speak. A sense of bright future by the side of his wife overwhelming him, he leaned down and captured her lips in a kiss, a perfect mixture between tenderness and passion. He forgot everything about war and his coming departure with the first rays of the sun, he forgot that tomorrow the harsh bitterness of life would catch up with him. All Anakin could think about was the feeling of elation at spending the entire night with his wife, and the prospect of many such nights yet to come made him the happiest man in the universe.

--------

Darth Sidious sneered maliciously at the black night. His plan had worked perfectly. What were such virtues as love and trust? These were things that were valued by the weak. Love was nothing, love was weak. Love could easily be destroyed. Love held no power.

Only darkness had power. All things would come and go, but darkness would persist. Because darkness was the ultimate power.


	12. Epilogue

**A/N: **So, this is the last instalment of this story, and I want to thank everyone who read it!

I saw that many of you put it on the alert and favourites list, and I'm really flattered that so many of you like it!

In particular, I'd like to thank all of my faithful reviewers! Your reviews kept me going, and they brought the inspiration and so many ideas for it. ;)

I'd really appreciate if some of the lurkers would de-lurk and tell me what you thought of this story. It is the last chapter, and I think it'd be only fitting if you submitted your first review on this story.

Thanks again, and I won't bore you any longer!

CrazyAni

**Epilogue**

_Six months later…_

The deafening explosions of countless volcanos drummed into her ears, and the prickling heat made her skin tingle. The endless rivers of lava were a horrible yet breath-taking sight, but Padmé saw only the reflection of the greedy flames in his cold eyes.

"Don't you understand? We don't have to hide anymore," Anakin said, a smile full of cruel triumph dancing on his lips. This cold sneer, full of malice was so unlike the warm smile of the man she loved… He kept talking, but Padmé couldn't hear him. She refused to hear him.

"Who are you? I don't know you!" she cried desperately, searching for any sign of the Anakin she knew in the man before her, but his cold, greedy eyes were all she saw. This man craved power… This man shed the blood of innocents and even children… This man wanted to destroy everything she stood for.

"Anakin," she gasped weakly, her vision obscured by endless tears. Everything was blurred, and Padmé could see only the deadly, infinite flames and the inhuman gleam in her husband's eyes. The baby kicked her hard, feeling as pained and distraught as its mother. It also ached for the love of its father, but its father had changed… And it was her fault.

"The galaxy lies at our feet, Padmé," Anakin said evenly, a cruel smile twisting his features. "I've done all of this for you."

Even though it was hot, Padmé felt icy chills running down her spine, cold claws tearing her heart mercilessly apart. The baby kicked even harder, howling in pain. Her husband was a murderer, a monster… Yet Padmé still believed that the Anakin she knew was not yet consumed by the darkness completely. The image from her nightmares flashed in her head, and the horrific sense of dread intensified.

"I need you Padmé," Anakin said softly, his eyes gleaming madly. "You and me, we will rule this galaxy, and our child will be raised in glory."

_This can't be happening! _

But the feeling of unbearable heat on her skin was real, and the almost physical pain of her breaking heart was overpowering. She was the one who had pushed him to darkness, and he deceived everyone only because of her. What should she choose? Staying by the side of this murderer and betrayer or remaining true to herself, to everything she valued? Should she let her child follow his true father's steps or be raised by the monster her husband had become?

_I will follow you to the darkest path you take_, her own words rang in her mind. Could she break her promise now, in the most desperate point of his life? If she stayed with him, would she be able to bring him back, or would she only lose herself and condemn the innocent life of her child?

"Anakin, you are walking down a path I cannot follow," she heard herself crying desperately. She felt as if it was a stranger standing next to the man within Anakin's body, not her... A volcanic explosion erupted from far away, and she felt her heart bleeding.

The look of malice in Anakin's eyes was replaced by hurt. Wild tears continued to run down her cheeks, and through the blurry cloud of moisture obscuring her sight, Padmé watched the cold blue turn into venomous yellow.

"I'm sorry," Padmé said, choking with her tears as she stepped back from the man she loved. "I'm so sorry...

"Don't touch her, Anakin," a male voice said from somewhere. Padmé knew this voice, but she couldn't recognise who its owner was. Did it matter? Did anything matter anymore? Anakin had broken her heart, and now she had broken his…

"Traitor!" Anakin yelled, his yellow eyes flashing madly at her. "You lured me into a trap!"

His eyes, filled with hatred, switched at somewhere past her back. Padmé followed his gaze, and saw Obi-Wan standing at the ramp of her ship. How did he get here? Anakin's yellow eyes focused on her again. They were void of warmth and love. Only infinite pain and the reflections of wild flames were visible.

"No, Anakin," Padmé protested weakly. Anakin extended his hand, and she felt invisible fingers grasping her throat and choking her. She tried to yank them away, but the action was futile.

"Anakin," she gasped weakly, feeling the strength leaving her. Black mist started clouding her vision, and she couldn't breathe any longer. Something hard hit her in the back, and Padmé's fading mind registered that she had fallen onto the rocky ground. Anakin's lips trembled, and a single tear was running from his yellow eyes.

The edge of her consciousness perceived a cry of pain, exactly the same one as the one from her dream months ago. His face, obscured by clouds of black mist, was the last thing she saw before falling into nothingness.

The hot, throbbing pain in his limbs was unbearable, and the hungry tongues of flames licking the remnants of his body made him scream uncontrollably. His eyesight was fading with each second, but he followed the retreating silhouette of the man he had believed to be his friend. The man who he had loved as a father. His best friend, his mentor. A traitor, who took his wife away from him and nearly killed him.

_I told you that he never loved you_, Vader said to him, and Anakin had to admit that the monster had always been right. If Obi-Wan had ever loved him, would he have walked away from him when he pleaded him to save him from the lava? Would he have condemned him to this horrible death? Would he have stolen his wife from him?

He couldn't hear anything except his own screams, but Padmé's words of rejection still rang in his mind, taunting him.

_I told you that she would betray you_, Vader whispered. He had been right all along. Padmé had already betrayed him once with the Dark Jedi, and now she had done it with Obi-Wan. Maybe she had never loved him, and he was a fool, believing in her games.

Savage flames ate at the handsome body, and the love that once filled it charred and turned into black ashes. All that was left of Anakin was a shattered body on the embankment of the lava river, burned and mutilated, and Vader was taking his place. Vader's darkness suffocated Anakin's light; the young man's bitterness and hurt feeding the monster and giving him the desire to live and to avenge, to make the others suffer as much as he did.

The young man with bright blue eyes who had wanted to bring the good to the galaxy burned away. The black sand that remained of him had nothing in common with the young boy who had wanted to free the slaves and see all the stars. Tears were the only reminder of his immeasurable love for an angel. The young man's soul burned away, and nothing was left of Anakin Skywalker's heart but the black ashes.

But a feeble light still survived in Vader's black soul, tarnished and polluted by the monster's darkness. It would wait for its hour to come.


End file.
